:. I can always make you smile! .:

Wreaths

2011-09-12T11:37:00.002-06:00

I have decided to sell handmade wreaths in an attempt to raise money for our wedding. I am willing to create any type of wreath for any season or holiday. Also, I can include a letter to present last name or a cross in the middle of the wreaths. Here are a few pictures!

Let me know if you would like a wreath, they are $35 or $45 with extra embellishment such as a letter or cross. I am willing to deliver them in Evanston, or anywhere around Ogden. :)

You can email me at nicolelinn@mail.weber.edu for more information.

2011-08-25T08:15:00.002-06:00

Yesterday, while sitting at work, I watched a baby sleep and I thought;

I thought about my first 3 days of school so far.

I thought about my first year of college.

I thought about my mom dropping me off at my dorm, getting it all set up, and leaving me there, alone. And then coming back the next day because she missed me so much already.

I thought about my mom dying. I thought about the call that I received from my dad asking me if the dorms were unlocked because he was there. I knew something was wrong, I knew that something was definitely wrong for my dad to be meeting me at my dorm at 7:30 on a Monday morning.

I went to unlock the outside doors of the building only to meet him at the elevator. We got on the elevator and the door closed. And it was then that my dad gave me the worst news of my life. I shook my head, I cried and I said "no" time after time.

On November 10, 2008, I had only been at Weber for a little over 2 months. And on November 17, I went back to school.

And as I sat yesterday, watching that baby sleep. I thought to myself.

"What was I thinking, going back to school 7 days after my mom's death?"

"Why in the world did I go back to school 3 days after laying my mom to rest?"

Well, maybe it was because my body was in too much shock. The death of mom wasn't real.

Or maybe it was because laying in bed crying would do more harm than it would good.

And it wasn't until I walked out of my math class, getting my phone from my pocket and calling my mom, that I realized that my life has forever been changed.

Yesterday, as I watched that baby sleep, I missed my mom.

I could only think of how proud she would be of me. I can only imagine what she would tell people about her daughter in college.

I thought about my wedding planning without my mom, my best friend. And I know that she would be sad to miss it.

But I don't think that anyone is sad in Heaven. I don't think that they miss out on anything. I'm sure that she is rooting for me in heaven, and giving me advice for my wedding in my thoughts and hopes.

But in so many ways, I miss my momma. I miss having someone who I trust in every aspect. I miss having someone call to make sure I'm okay and to give me advice on how I should properly clean my toilet. I miss having her ask me for a 'poopoo', and I miss her tight hug and endless 'I love you's'. And that is something that no one can ever replace.

Our Wedding

2011-08-03T20:44:00.005-06:00

Jerry and I have began planning our wedding.

Last weekend we went Grand Targhee Resort to look around. We loved it!

We have decided that it is going to be the place!

We were hoping to get married in June, but we found out that there would be too much snow in June. So we decided on July 7th, but when I emailed the guy, he said that there was already a wedding scheduled for that day. Now we are waiting to hear back from him on the other dates that we will be able to plan for sure.

Look how beautiful!

I have been trying to pick colors for the wedding, but I have been having a hard time. And Jerry isn't any help, sometimes he has a giant opinion, and other times he doesn't care at all. I'm not sure what I would prefer.

As of now, I have it down to two options, tell me what you think.

Option number one-

Everyone wears black and white. Center pieces and flowers will be pink and green, like this. :)

Option number two-

Neutral colors like brown and tan, with a light pink. More like this.....

Well tell me, what do you think?

B.

2011-07-27T20:46:00.003-06:00

His name was Oliver B. Oxen Free. You know, Ollie Ollie Oxen Free?

But we called him B.

It was Christmas time, when I was fifteen years old. My mom kept telling me that she was getting the best Christmas present for me! I knew that she had been looking on the internet, so I spied and looked online. The site that she was on was KSL. I could only wonder what special Christmas present that I would be getting from KSL, the possibilities were endless.

On Christmas eve my mom, dad and Richard drove to Provo, UT to pick up my special gift. That night when my mom got home, she called and told me to come see my present, I thought I was getting a car! I walked out of my room to find a tiny kitten in a wicker basket.

He was a pure bred Siamese cat. The cutest little kitty I had ever seen. I was so excited, my very own cat. I considered many names for him, Oswald, Harry, Theodore but finally, my mom and I picked Oliver.

I love him more than anything! I would sleep with him, and cry with him. And my mom would ask him, "B, you want a sagey? (massage) He would run to her bed and roll over. My mom would give him a neck massage as he laid on his back. He loved her and she loved him.

When I left for college, leaving Oliver and Stanley was just as hard as leaving my parents. My mom would send me pictures of the cats laying on my bed.

Unfortunately, today 7 years later, my dad called to tell me that he had found B dead. :( I was devastated, and could only think of B bonking his head on the coffee table as he always did. I thought about his cute little meow, and the way he would nudge me to pet him.

I loved that cat, almost as much as I love Jerry. I am going to miss him, but I can picture my mom giving B a massage in Heaven.

I'm going to miss you Oliver B, I love you kitty cat!

Just a little wake up call. :)

2011-07-15T11:11:00.001-06:00

Because he's my dad.....

2011-06-20T08:18:00.004-06:00

Well I know it's a day late, but it's never too late to brag about your dad. So let me tell you a little bit about my dad.

He has always pushed me to do my best. I remember times that I would bring home a report card with all A's and one A- and he would want to know why I didn't get an A in that class. But I always knew he was proud of me.

He has always worked so hard to make sure that I had everything!

He has been my best friend my entire life, and I know that he is always there for me.

He is my best advocate, and sticks up for me in every situation.

I remember one time when I was little I was taking a bath and I lathered my hair up with shampoo, and sticking it all to the top of my head so that it would look like I had short hair. I stood up to look in the mirror and I was so surprised to see just how much I looked like him.

My dad loves to tell me stories about his childhood.

He thinks that he is a pretty funny guy, and often laughs at his jokes when no one else is.

My dad is one of the smartest people I know. Whenever I have a question that no one else can answer, I know he will either know the answer, or make up a believable one.

When I was in Elementary school he would always get excited for the science fair, and [WE] would always get first place. :)

He loves me unconditionally, and I know that whenever I need him he will be there.

In so many ways my dad and I are alike. We don't like to talk to people on the phone, we don't like to be around big crowds of people we don't know, we love our family and we love each other.

My dad is my hero.

I love him!

June 17th

2011-06-16T21:32:00.003-06:00

Happy Birthday mom. I wish you were here to celebrate. I would drive to Evanston, just to see you on your birthday. I would make you German chocolate cake, and Kimber would come to visit. I can see you dancing to Simply Red, that would be playing loud in the back ground. You would have shorts on, because it would be a hot day. You would be so happy because everyone you love would be there to visit. At work you would eat cake and dad would send you flowers. And you wouldn't even mind that you were turning 53 years old, because you never looked a day over 30.

You would hold Stanley and B, kissing them on their neck as they purr. You would laugh and smile at your beautiful grand daughter. And I would look at you, smiling, knowing that I am the luckiest girl in the world to have you as my mom.

But because you aren't here, physically, to celebrate your 53rd birthday, we will celebrate your life, and the legend you left behind. We will spend the weekend, camping in "Winnie" our old motor home, and hanging out on "The Woman," our boat that we named after you. Not a minute will go by that we won't watch for you in the sky, and we will tell stories of your life. But most of all, we will be happy, because I know that more than anything, you would want us to be happy, especially on your birthday.

Never a day goes by that we don't think of you. You are a precious piece of our hearts and always will be. I love you mom, and I miss you more than words can tell. I can't wait to see you again someday.

Happy Birthday Momma!

I love you.

Cole

My job and my career.

2011-06-07T21:13:00.002-06:00

I can't say that I love everything about my current job.

I wouldn't even say that the job I have now is something that I would enjoy doing for the rest of my life.

There are moments when I would rather flip burgers at Mc Donalds. And there are moments when I question my future career that I have spent 3 years so far preparing for.

There are several times EVERY day that I shake my head in disbelief. And there are times that I want to give up and walk away.

Certain situations put me right back in my childhood, others make me wish I was still there.

Patience and smiles have to be plentiful all.day.long. And not a day goes by that I don't tie shoes, wipe noses or kiss boo boos.

I get home from work, to tell Jerry about the kids, the funny things they say, the fights they get in to, the questions that they ask.

"Why is my shadow following me? And why is it black?"

There are times when, "Miss Nicole" is the last thing I want to hear.

But never a day goes by that there isn't a moment that makes me think ((that's why I want to work with kids.))

I smile all day long. I laugh all day long. I get drawings and hugs all day long.

Every day that I am at the daycare, especially the days that I work with the school age kids, I learn more and more. I learn what to do, and even more, I learn what not to do.

Everyday I spend 8 hours with kids that I won't know in 2 years, but to know that I had a part in their life means everything to me.

Who knew a minimum wage job would be worth so much more?

We Build Our Life

2011-05-23T19:53:00.002-06:00

We are born, and from that point forward, we live to survive. Everything we do, is to stay alive. we help others, stay alive. We raise children, and keep them alive.

Yet there is more to this life other than living, other than keep our self alive, there is more than keeping our body healthy. And maybe it is because as humans, we are intelligent enough to feel love, to work hard, to create relationships, to have faith, to believe and to remember. We aren't a bug in the wind hoping to miss the next windshield on the interstate, if only bugs spend time to hope at all.

We remember our past, think of our future, work hard to create something out of this life....something worth remembering, worth looking forward to.

We spend countless hours living a life that may be minimal compared to what lies ahead of us after we die. If we spend eternity in heaven, our time in this place is minuscule.

Yet we spend so much time preparing for what is a 'perfect life' and what makes us happy.

And too often, we work for what is easy, for the things that makes us feel at ease. We try everyday to forget the things that make our heart hurt. We store in the back of our mind natural disasters on the other side of the world, lies that we should have never told, forgotten friends, loss of family, loss of faith and loss of self.

We spend so much of our time trying to make our self happy, but happiness is no more than the chance to live another day. The opportunity, as intelligent human beings, to love those who support us, stand by us.

Happiness is having someone by your side, keeping you alive. Someone who cares enough to see to it that you eat, that you sleep, that you wake up every morning to live another day. Happiness is living.

Summer is Here!

2011-05-03T13:02:00.002-06:00

My summer break started over a week ago, and I have been loving it.

I have only been working 3 hours a day, so I have had a lot of free time. Free time in which I have, cleaned, scrapbooked, spent ridiculous amounts of time on Facebook, and looked for a new job.

I really love my job, and I love all those kids more than anything. But I am worried that they aren't going to need me to work full-time. Working part-time is great, but man I get bored....not to mention I could really use more money. I have been applying everywhere, hopefully something will come through.

On Thursday, my sister will be heading to Vegas, leaving The Princessa, with Jerry and I for 5 days. We are going to have a lot fun. And I hope that this is only the first of many trips she will make to spend a couple days with Aunt Coco.

Well, this is quite a boring post, as I have nothing good to blog about, so I will leave it at that.

Don't forget, Sunday is Mother's day! Kiss your momma for me!

One More Time: Just in Case

2011-04-26T21:03:00.002-06:00

Since the day that I took my last final, my mom has been on my mind.

School has had me so caught up-

--caught up in my future

--caught up in my grades

--caught up procrastination.

I didn't have time to think about my mom, or the fact that I missed her more than I could ever imagine.

Last Thursday, I took my last final, I put my books away, and I listened to music that made me cry, because I missed my mom.

My aunts (my mom's sisters) were in town for my cousins graduation. Jerry and I spent time with them. And the next day, my dad, Penny, Jessica and Kimber joined us. My mom would have loved the opportunity to see everyone. And I know that she would be so proud of Lynndsey, one of few family members to graduate from college.

Well, I went to bed that night, happy....

happy to see my family,

happy to kiss my princessa,

happy to spend as much time as possible with family I hardly get to see.

But I missed my mom, and I missed her more than I have for a long, long time.

And it's a little weird, because Friday morning, Jerry sent me a text that said, "You should listen to the song, 'If Heaven Wasn't so Far Away.'

I told him that I had heard the song, and that I like it.

That night before we went to bed, I told him that I listened to the song, and it made cry. I told him I missed my mom. He understood, like he always does, and he gave me a hug...like he always does. He just knows me so well.

I enjoyed the weekend, loving my family, doing a little shopping and celebrating Lynndsey's graduation.

On Sunday, a FB friend put a link for this blog, http://www.mattlogelin.com....and I have been reading, and reading and reading blog posts that were posted over 2 years ago, in 2008 (the year that my mom died).

I recommend the blog to anyone.....everyone.

To make a long story short, the blog is written by a man who lost his wife only 27 hours after his daughter was born.

It has really made me think.

We don't have forever in this world. We don't always have another change to say 'I love you' or another chance to give a hug to those who we love most.

So, every night I have been hugging Jerry a little tighter, and one extra time, just in case.

I always make Jerry give me 3 kisses before we go to sleep, but lately it has been 6.

And I have even been telling everyone on my Facebook 'Happy Birthday'.

I just want to make sure, that when it comes down to my last day on this earth, my last day with my family, my last chance, that I won't leave one regret behind me.

There is just so much more to this life than having it all, there more to it than having more money than your neighbor, there is more to it than reality TV.

I'm going to give more hugs and kisses, just in case.

I'm going to say "I love you" more often, just in case.

I'm going to pray more often.

I'm going to do the things that make me happy, just because it makes me happy.

And I'm going to remember my mom, each and every day.

Back to Blogging

2011-04-17T22:04:00.002-06:00

Well, I'm afraid to admit, I may never finish the 30 day photo challenge. It requires a lot of energy and commitment, how pathetic am I?

Well, nonetheless, tomorrow is the first day of finals week. I have been finding every excuse not to study. I have made peanut butter cookies, redesigned my blog, made banana bread, took a nap, convinced my self that I didn't need to study because I have all week, and finally now, I am writing a new blog post. I may regret that decision later this week, but for now, it seems to be okay. :)

I am looking forward to the upcoming days, weeks and months. My aunts and cousins will be here this week, for my cousin's graduation, and I can't wait to see them. I will be one semester closer to the end of the semester by Friday. And I look forward to all that summer will bring.

I hope that as the semester ends, I will have the opportunity to relax more, and hopefully that means that I will blog more. :)

Happy Sunday night my friends!

Jerry and I are watching the Wizard of Oz. :)

Day 16

2011-03-06T18:39:00.002-07:00

Day 16 - A picture of someone you've been friends with the longest and still feel connected to.

The person I have been friends with the longest, aside from family, would have to be Kelsey. We went to Kindergarten together all the way until we graduated from high school. Even though we don't see each other often, we still remain friends, and I will always love her. :)

Day 15

2011-03-05T08:45:00.002-07:00

Day 15 - A picture of something you want to do before you die.

Well, let's see, some people might say they want to sky dive before they die, but I have no desire for that. Some would say they want to save the world, well I'd like to try.

Someday, before I die, I would like to go on a mission trip, where I would work to help someone. Maybe in Africa?? Only time will tell.... :)

Day 14

2011-03-04T12:29:00.004-07:00

Day 14 - A picture of your favorite pastime.

When I think of my favorite past time, I immediately think of summertime, and Beak Lake. I love to be there and if I could be there everyday, I would be. :) I love it!

Day 13

2011-03-03T09:11:00.002-07:00

Day 13 - A picture of your favorite band or artist.

Hmmm. I guess, I can't really tell you who my favorite band or artist is, because I like so many, so much.

I like artists and bands like, Brad Paisley, Kenny Chesney, Rascall Flatts.

And I like Elton John, Billy Joel, The Beatles, Phil Collins and The Doors.

And there are so many more. I can't pick just one.

Day 12

2011-03-02T07:18:00.005-07:00

So, I had to take a little break from my 30 days of pictures. Last week I had the flu, and a painful Ovarian cyst. Luckily, I am feeling much better now. I have had no motivation the last few weeks, not for school, not for blogging, not for anything. It is coming back slowly, thankfully.

Day 12 - A picture of something you love

There are lists and lists of the things that I love.

I love my cats, Stanley and B.

I love my family

I love the smell of a new book.

I love cotton candy.

I love babies. Especially my favorite Kimber Barrett Roberts.

I love to have a clean house.

I love to talk to my mom.

I love sleeping in.

I love talking about memories.

I love to go boating.

I love Saturdays.

I love to laugh.

I love my jeep.

I love being loved.

I love Kasey Kahne and Kyle Korver.

I love The Beatles, Elton John and Billy Joel.

I love school.

I love being outside.

I love figuring out a good math problem.

I love to make dinner.

I love to make people laugh.

I love to see Jerry smile.

I love my president.

I love Christmas.

Day 10

2011-02-18T09:18:00.002-07:00

Day 10 - A picture of someone you see yourself marrying in the future.

Apparently I skipped day 10, I'm not sure how that happens. But this one is an easy one. Jerry and I will be getting married in the Summer of 2012. I have known for probably the last 3 years that I was going to marry him someday. I can't wait to spend the rest of my life with him. :)

Day 11

2011-02-17T09:51:00.003-07:00

Day 11 - A picture of something you hate.

I hate spiders, snakes and all bugs.

I hate the commercials on TV that talk about abused animals, and for only 35 cents a day, I could save them.

I hate overpriced books for college.

Hmmmm, and for now, I can't think of anything else that I hate. There are many things that I dislike, but to hate something, well, that is very strong.

Day 9

2011-02-16T08:18:00.003-07:00

Day 09 - A picture of the person who has gotten you through the most.

When I think about the person who has gotten me through the most, I immediately think of Jerry. He has been there for me through my junior prom, high school graduation, my first year of college, and most importantly, the death of my mom. I don't know what I would have done if I didn't have him there with me. In fact, I think that my life would be much different right now if he wasn't there. Would I have been strong enough to go on? I don't know. He always lets me cry when I need to. He always knows the right thing to say. I always know that I can go to him, when I need him most, and he can help me though anything. He's the best.

Day 8

2011-02-15T14:15:00.002-07:00

Day 08 - A picture that makes you laugh.

This picture makes me laugh, mostly because the three of us could never be serious. When we are together, we are always laughing. We use to have little 'photo shoots' everytime we were together. We would choose different facial expressions like serious, kissy face, big smile, regular smile....blah blah blah. In this picture Katie and Baillie were going to kiss my cheeks. But we just couldn't hold it in, and Baillie's brother snapped the picture just in time. :)

Day 7

2011-02-14T08:26:00.003-07:00

Day 07 - A picture that shows your true self.

When I think about my true self, I think of the person that I want people to see in me. The person that I am, loves her family, Jerry, cats and children. I wouldn't be able to live my life with out these things. Here are a few pictures of the true me. :)

Day 6

2011-02-13T09:04:00.003-07:00

Day 06 - A picture of somewhere you've been.

My absolute favorite place that I have ever been is Paris. I can't wait to someday go back. If I spoke French, and it wouldn't leave me so far away from my family, I would move there! It is beautiful. There are fresh flowers sold everywhere. The food is delicious and the streets are beautiful. The architecture is amazing, and there are castles and cathedrals everywhere. Just thinking of it makes me love it all over again. I can't wait until the day that I go back. :)

Day 5

2011-02-12T10:37:00.003-07:00

Day 05 - A picture of your favorite memory.

In this picture, we are sitting in the ocean, in Mexico, getting ready to go para-sailing. We were in Mexico for our graduation vacation. My mom loved planning the vacation, and we did so many fun things. We spent time with each other, getting to know each other, doing crazy things and loving Mexico. Para-sailing was one of my most favorite things that we did while we were there, we saw sting rays from the sky, and my dad freaked out when my mom would shake them. I wish I could go back there with them right now. :)

Day 4

2011-02-12T10:27:00.003-07:00

Day 04 - A picture of your day.

So, I really couldn't think of a picture that I could post to show my day yesterday (because I forgot to post.) But let me just describe it for you.

I woke up, went to class. Came home, got online to do some of my online class homework, only to find out that I had missed not only 1, but 2 essays. :( I get so caught up in my other classes, that completely forget about my other classes. So, without the time to do the essays, I decided that I would put them off until today. I then went to work. I spent time with four babies, for 6 hours. When I got home from work, Jerry and I went to the movies. We saw, "Just go with it," it was a very funny movie and I loved it. Then, we went to go see Ice Cube, because he was in Ogden, but apparently everyone...EVERYONE wanted to see Ice Cube. So we went to dinner instead, at Texas Roadhouse. After dinner we decided to go to the Outlaw for a margarita. We had one drink and left, came home and went to bed.

If you could put that into a picture, what would the picture be of? Because I tried taking a picture, but how do you take a picture of one aspect, and expect it to show the whole day?

Day 3

2011-02-10T08:18:00.003-07:00

Day 03 - A picture of the cast from your favorite show...

I have a new favorite show. We have Netflix, and one day I decided to watch the first episode of season 1 of Grey's anatomy. I love it! I'm in the middle of season 2 now, and I can't wait to watch the rest. I'm so glad that I didn't get into the show until after it came out on Netflix, because I like the leisurely of watching it when I get time. :) I love that show!

Day 2

2011-02-10T08:03:00.003-07:00

Day 02 - A picture of you and the person you have been closest with the longest.

My sweet momma. No one has a best friend, quite like mine. I have been close to my mom my entire life. There wasn't a day that went by that I didn't talk to my mom. And when I was in France, I became homesick, because I missed her so much. She is my favorite person. She is the most perfect person. I miss her, so much, everyday.

Day 1

2011-02-08T21:04:00.002-07:00

Day 01 - A picture of yourself with 10 facts.

1- My favorite color is pink.

2- I love Jerry, and some days, I am still amazed that he is in my life. :)

3- I miss my mom so much, and there isn't a day that goes by that I don't think of her.

4- I love my cats, Stanley and B so very much!

5- My dad is my best friend.

6- I love my sister Jessica and I have always looked up to her.

7- I love my princessa, and I wouldn't change my role as her aunt for anything.

8- I have known since I was in 2nd grade that I wanted to be a teacher.

9- I have a really good memory, and I can remember almost anything.

10- I love the feeling I get when I correctly complete a challenging math problem.

30 Days of Enlightenment

2011-02-08T21:02:00.001-07:00

A few of my favorite blogs that I read have been doing this, so I thought, why not? Can't wait to see what comes up! :)

With each prompt post a picture!

Day 01 - A picture of yourself with 10 facts.
Day 02 - A picture of you and the person you have been closest with the longest.
Day 03 - A picture of the cast from your favorite show....
Day 04 - A picture of your day.
Day 05 - A picture of your favorite memory.
Day 06 - A picture of somewhere you've been.
Day 07 - A picture that shows your true self.
Day 08 - A picture that makes you laugh.
Day 09 - A picture of the person who has gotten you through the most.
Day 10 - A picture of someone you see yourself marrying in the future.
Day 11 - A picture of something you hate.
Day 12 - A picture of something you love
Day 13 - A picture of your favorite band or artist.
Day 14 - A picture of your favorite pastime.
Day 15 - A picture of something you want to do before you die.
Day 16 - A picture of someone you've been friends with the longest and still feel connected to
Day 17 - A picture of your biggest insecurity.
Day 18 - A picture of your favorite place.
Day 19 - A picture of a habit you wish you didn't have
Day 20 - A picture of somewhere you'd love to travel.
Day 21 - A picture of something you wish you could forget.
Day 22 - A picture of something you wish you were better at
Day 23 - A picture of your favorite book.
Day 24 - A picture of something you wish you could change
Day 25 - A picture of you last year and how you've changed since then
Day 26 - A picture of something that means a lot to you.
Day 27 - A picture of yourself and a family member.
Day 28 - A picture of something you're afraid of.
Day 29 - A picture that can always make you smile.
Day 30 - A picture of someone you miss.

Volkswagen Commercial: The Force

2011-02-07T20:17:00.000-07:00

My favorite commercial this year.

Kids just make me so happy. :)

What's there to complain about?

2011-02-07T13:02:00.003-07:00

Some days going to class, is so much work. It takes so much motivation.

Some days staying awake in class, wears me out, more than anything.

Some days, coming home from work and class leaves me to tired to do homework.

There are days, where I would rather sit on the couch all day, with a blanket and a movie. I could nap all day.

Even some days, I would rather not get out of bed, I would leave the lights off, I would leave the blinds closed.

Yet everyday, I get up, I go and go and go. And I come home, to homework, for dinner, to see my Jerold Dean and bed.

And I wouldn't have it any other way.

Homework

2011-02-02T20:53:00.002-07:00

Sometimes I think that I have done more homework in my life, than I have done anything else.

Too bad the work couldn't just do it's self, and the knowledge would somehow just enter my brain.

But if that were possible, I wouldn't be in school, and I definitely wouldn't be going to school to become a teacher, I just wouldn't be needed. Hmmmm.

Brrrr.

2011-02-01T15:16:00.003-07:00

It's cold today.

Bitterly cold.

The kind of cold that makes you want to cuddle under a blanket in bed all day.

The wind blew so hard that it made my eyes water. The wind blew so hard it made my tears freeze.

It's so cold outside that I wish it was summer. I wish that was wearing a t-shirt, capris and flip flops rather than a sweatshirt, pants, huge socks, a wool coat, scarf, gloves and hood.

If only it were 40 degrees out. I could handle that.

Stay warm my friends.

This Day. This Life.

2011-01-31T20:36:00.002-07:00

You know some days you just want to push fast forward.....

Those are the days that you wish that time could pass, and you wouldn't even have to think about it.

They are the days that you look forward to marking things off your to do list.

And sometimes we want to fast forward through weeks too,

or months,

or seasons,

or years.

But what we don't think about is.....

What we are wanting to fast forward and forget, is slowly shaping us into the person we are.

And sometimes, those very times, when we wish that we just didn't have to think at all, are the times that we are learning the most, gaining the most....becoming more than we ever have been.

Those times that we wish would quickly pass, is our life, passing by minute by minute, hour by hour, day by day, season by season, year by year. We are progressively becoming closer to the end of our life. . . one step at a time.

And that is not a threat, it isn't an hour glass with sand falling slowly, it's a promise.

A promise for a life with lessons.

A promise for days worth living, worth learning, worth looking forward to.

It's not only a promise for the future but a promise of something spectacular. A promise of new friends, new knowledge, and renewed relationships.

It's a chance, to become better, to live life to the fullest and not regret one day....not matter the day.at.all.

If you wait too long for the perfect moment. The perfect moment will pass you by.

The things we remember....

2011-01-27T13:23:00.004-07:00

As I am preparing to take my first math test of the semester, I am trying to make my self remember every detail, every formula, everything.

But I can remember all kinds of things, some ridiculous things and very special things.

I can remember every sign between Ogden and Evanston, that says how many miles there are left, and I remember the number of miles too.

I can remember that my dad's number one rule is, never wake him up.

I can remember that to make a can of Cambell's soup it takes one can of water.

I can remember that rent is due on the 1st of every month.

I can remember to fill up my gas tank before it's empty.

I remember my mom telling me one day while she cleaned the sink, that I should always remember to clean the sink.

I remember the words to my favorite song.

I remember my best friends names and birthdays.

I remember the things my mom would say to me, "Give me a poo-poo". (Poo-poo=Kiss)

I remember that Jerry doesn't like vegetables.

I remember to put socks on everyday.

Why is it, that when it comes to math, and I study for ever, I just can't remember it all?

Is it because I'm not interested in it? Well, it could be, but math is pretty interesting to me.

Is it because my brain is almost filled to capacity? I think so. lol

It could be because I don't spend as much time thinking about math as I do my socks, or as much time studying math as I do driving between Ogden and Evanston.

Or maybe because math isn't a regular routine to me.

Some say that if you say something 5 times you will remember it forever, or was it 10 times?

Well, I have studied, and studied, and studied until I can study no more. I am going to take my test. Wish me luck.

Happy Thursday my friends!

You're gonna wish these days hadn't gone by so fast.

2011-01-26T22:07:00.002-07:00

I took some pictures of Jerry a few weeks ago. I've been meaning to post about them for awhile now. Because I just laughed so hard.

You see, Jerry's mom got us a dresser for Christmas. Because between my large wardrobe, and every shirt that Jerry has owned, ever...the closet just wasn't working. You see, it's a walk in closet, sort of. Except, the bars to hang clothes goes horizontally ACROSS the width of the closet, then there are shelfs in the back that you can put clothes on. If we wanted to get to the shelfs in the back, we had to climb through the clothes that were hung. Basically, we desperately needed a dresser.

So on Christmas eve, the RC Willey men, came to the door with a dresser in their arms. I began to panic about the dresser fitting through the door, passed the Tv, and into the bedroom. Luckily it did, I signed the paper and the men were on there way.

I began filling the dresser with our clothes. Organizing, I had every drawer open, and the dresser began to tip over on me, I held the tv that was on top as I pushed the dresser back into place. I thought that I had just filled the drawers too full, and left them open, therefore the dresser tipped. No big deal.

Well, after Jerry and I got home from Christmas in Evanston, we decided to put our fish tank on top of the dresser, and that's when we found, the dresser was noticeably unlevel, crooked, leaning.far.forward.

Well, we tried a few different techniques. Jerry started by putting a piece of card board under one leg of the dresser. Well, come to find out, not only did the dresser lean forward, but also to the left. Jerry decided we would put coins under the dresser to level it. It took 5 or 6 coins, and they began to slip. So Jerry decided to tape the coins together. Nice huh?

Someday, I can't wait to live in a level house, with a big walk in closet. But until then I won't rush because how does that song go?

You're gonna miss this?

God love her.

2011-01-26T13:03:00.002-07:00

I'm just getting ready to head back for my last class of the day.

I got on Facebook to and to my sweet surprise there was a new picture posted of my momma and I.

Just seeing her in pictures reminds me so much about her, like I had seen her yesterday.

I sure miss her.

Sometimes the smallest things in life, hold the biggest place in your heart.

2011-01-25T09:38:00.004-07:00

This weekend, we got to go visit my Princessa. She is almost 6 months old, and growing everyday, I don't think she has skipped one day. at. all.

She's on the chunky side, with chunky, squeezable legs, cheeks and belly. And I love everything about her.

Her Grandpa loves her so so much.

Her Uncle Jers loves her. Penny loves her. Her mommy, daddy, many aunts, uncles and cousins, love her.

And I love her!

She is such a special little girl.

We took her swimming at the hotel while we were there. At first she thought the water was a little too cold for her. But she warmed up. :) She even go to soak in the hot tub for a minute. :)

Her dad and I had a little swim race. He won. But just barely, and in my defense , I'm shorter, and the shape of the pool was odd.

We spent lots of time making her smile, and holding her, kissing her and loving her.

Time for us to head home, came much too quickly, and I was sad to tell her goodbye, because I know that next time I see her, she will be even bigger, even smarter, even cuter. I wish they lived closer.

Life's travels

2011-01-18T15:00:00.003-07:00

Isn't it crazy, how we begin our life with certain people, and as we grow older the distance between those certain people also grows?

There has to some reason that these people were put in our life, whether it is to teach us a lesson, to shape our personality, to create something or to become lifelong friends.

Sometimes people go in out of our life so quickly, sometimes I meet people one day, that I will never see again in my life. We may go to a basketball game, an watch a team from out of state, in which one of the players may score more than he will ever again in his lifetime, and even though those moments are huge in his life, he will never know that we were there watching, because we are strangers.

There are instances when we hold doors for others, smile at strangers or give a couple dollars to a homeless person, and I believe that all these instances shape us as human beings.

When I was in high school, I had a group of good friends. The best friends. I would see them everyday. We would schedule classes together. We would play sports together and run for student council together. We would go on double dates, eat lunch and shop together.

Today, that group of friends, remains friends, just much further apart.

Kelsey, just got back from Ecuador, and is now studying in Laramie.

Katie is currently in the Netherlands.

Justine is in Salt Lake.

Baillie is in Logan.

Dawn Anne is in Laramie.

And I'm in Ogden.

Somehow we still manage to get together. I talk to all of them all the time, through Facebook mostly, or text. Perhaps we should have all gone to the same college, or maybe we should all be in the Netherlands.

I miss the days, that I could see them, whenever I wanted. And I miss the days, that I knew every little detail about everything they were doing.

But I do know this, each and everyone of them has shaped me into the person that I am today. They have all helped me to accomplish something. And when I have exciting news, or I've had a bad day, they are the first people I go to.

They mean so very much to me. And some days, I would much rather be sitting at a lunch table at Evanston High School with my very best friends.

Happy Martin Luther King Jr. Day!

2011-01-17T11:34:00.002-07:00

I am very grateful for Martin Luther King Jr. in many ways.

He achieved so much in his lifetime, much more than most people.

I am thankful for this day off, sometimes everyone needs a day off.

Jerry and I stayed up till 12:30 playing Monopoly on the Wii last night.

He won 3 times, I won 1.

And in case you were wondering, it took us 5 hours to play 4 games. uh hu. Monopoly is a very long game, even on the Wii.

I woke up this morning around 9. I got on Facebook, and to my sweet surprise my best friend Katie was online. Which is typical, but not today, today she is in the Netherlands, with an 8 hour time change, all the way across the world.

And even though, usually Katie is 6 hours away in Laramie Wyoming, I miss her much more when she is in the Netherlands.

As I have chatted to Katie, for the last 2 and a half hours, I made stuffed bell peppers for Jerry and I to have for dinner. I prepared them all the way until the point that I would usually put them in the oven. Jerry is going to put them in the oven when he gets home. And while I was at it, I made a cherry chip cake. :)

I think I will take a shower, and go the Michaels to buy some craft stuff. I got a Cricut for Christmas, and I've been dying to make something!

I hope you too, are enjoying your Martin Luther King Jr. Day!

I have decided to stick with love. Hate is too great a burden to bear.

-Martin Luther King Jr.

Finally,

2011-01-06T21:22:00.003-07:00

Finally today I got my ring back from the jewelers, and finally today, I get to wear it!

And finally today, I am going to tell you how he asked me. :)

As Christmas week came, Jerry told me that he wanted to have our own little Christmas at our house, on Christmas eve morning, since we were headed to Evanston that night for Christmas with both of our families. I agreed, I told him that I would wake up with him at 5:30 that morning so that we could open our presents to each other that were under our tree.

I woke up that morning and he told me to wait in the bedroom while he got everything ready. I then got all of his stuff ready. We both stuffed a stocking for each other and we opened those first. I then told Jerry to open one of his presents. He opened the impact wrench that I got him, and then I opened a sweatshirt that he got me. Then he opened snowboarding boots, and I opened a pair of earrings. Finally he gave me a card, inside the very sweet card, he wrote something about how he wished that someday that I could wake up and put a ring on my finger knowing that I would always be with him. He then wrote that he had a gift from his heart in the tree. I went to the tree looking underneath it, I looked and looked, but still couldn't find anything. He said that I needed to read the card more carefully. So, I read it again, it said, "Your last gift is something from my heart, and it is IN the tree." That's when I looked in the tree, I noticed a ring hanging on a silver ornament in the tree. I was so excited I just looked at him and smiled. I took the ring of the ornament, and that's when he asked me! I was so excited!

The only problem was, the ring was too big. My sweet Jers read online somewhere that a girls shoe size is the same as her ring size. That may be true with some people, but for me it's not. My shoe size is 8 and my ring size is 5.5. So Jers took it to Zales last week to get it sized, and finally today it was done. I am so exited to be wearing it! I love it!

The question everyone is asking is, "When?" And our answer is, sometime in 2012. We haven't set a for sure date yet, because we want to wait until I graduate. I am hoping for summer time, although Jerry thinks he wants to get married on top of a ski hill, and snowboard down after the ceremony. Luckily, I have a year to change his mind. :)

School

2011-01-03T10:37:00.003-07:00

So I'm sitting at the WSU union building. I slipped as I walked from my parking spot on the street to class because apparently they don't shovel here anymore. I also watched at least 4 people fall on the ice.

As I went to my class at 8:30, the teacher announced that the same class is being offered at 9:30, so I switched to allow for more sleep. :)

It has started out to be a fairly good day though, I am now waiting to go to my 11:30 class, which is Children's Literature, I am really looking forward to the class, despite the fact that it requires 5 books, 2 of which are over $100. Maybe I can find these books somewhere cheaper online, I'm hoping. Last semester I bought a book, that we didn't even use in class, I still had it in the plastic wrapping, and when I sold it back, I got less than half of what I paid for it. This semester I have decided not to buy the book until I know that I will need it.

I am drinking a mocha and eating a bagel as I watch people walk in from outside.

I hope you have a Happy Monday my friends!

Top 10 2010

2011-01-02T21:26:00.009-07:00

I was so hoping that I would make a cute little blog post about our very special Christmas, but I don't see that happening any time soon, as school starts up again tomorrow.

So instead, I will posting about the top 10 things, or events rather of my 2010. It has been a very special year, in which I will never ever forget.

10. Boating with my most favorite people.

9. Moving in with Jerry.

8. Starting the teaching program at Weber State University.

7. Snowboarding with Jerry, Kami and James.

6. Going to Wendover, the Zac Brown Band and on many adventures with my sweet dad, Penny and Jerry.

5. Playing poker, and laughing so hard with Bart and Rani.

4. Making Christmas goodies with Penny and Katie.

3. I turned 21, and had the most memorable birthday party with my family and friends.

2. My sweet princessa, Kimber Barrett Roberts was born July 29, 2010.

1. My sweet Jerold Dean asked me to marry him.

As for 2011, I can't wait. I look forward to all that another year will bring. I can't wait to see what I else I will learn and who I will meet. I have never made real resolutions, that actually happen. But a few goals for the next year for my self will include,

1. Getting in shape.

2. Getting good grades.

3. Blogging daily, or at least more often.

4. Spending lots of time with the people I love.

5. Spending more time with my beloved Stanley, I miss him so much!

Happy 2011 my friends! I hope you find this year filled with good health, happiness and friendship. :)

Four Years

2010-12-09T08:27:00.004-07:00

Jerry and I have been dating for four years today.

The time has gone by fairly fast, although at times it seems as though it has been forever.

We spent 5 months in High school dating. 1 year, he was in Rock Springs, while I was still in high school. The next year he was in Rock Springs, while I was at Weber. The year after that we went to Weber together, and for the last 9 months, we have lived together in a tiny house.

My love for him has never subsided, in fact I know that it has grown everyday since day one.

I love the time that we get to spend together and just talk about our day. He never leaves a detail out, about what he did at work each day. He continues to tell me about the work that he does on cars, even though he knows I don't understand.

He questions me about the cars that we pass on the road, and when I get one right he always says, 'Good work.'

He never fails to tell me good luck before a test, and tell me, 'I knew you'd do good,' when I tell him my score.

He always remembers to give me [[3]] kisses before we fall asleep, and he gives me more, when I think it's necessary. :)

He never questions the crazy things that I want to do in my life.

And he puts up with my crazy cleaning routine, in which I believe you should always dust BEFORE you vacuum, even though he insists on vacuuming first.

He let me put up our Christmas tree before Thanksgiving.

He doesn't get mad when the house becomes a disaster when I do all my crafts.

He loves to tickle me, especially when I'm laughing too hard to tell him to stop.

He's a picky eater, but when he finds something that he likes, he eats it a lot.

He would eat popcorn every night, if I let him. And if we had a bigger house, that he could chomp on popcorn without me hearing, I would let him. :)

He is a hard worker, he is smart and he is always willing to help out other people.

He loves to be with kids, almost as much as I do. ;)

He hangs Maddie over the edge, and teases her, and she teases him in return.

And he has really taken a liking to his role as 'uncle Jers'.

My mom loved Jerry too, and that is one more thing that makes our relationship very special to me. He has helped me out through so many things, and he has never once complained.

He is so special to me, he always texts me to tell me that he loves me, at least 3 times a day. He helps cook dinner and hangs lights on our house for Christmas.

He is absolutely, the best boyfriend that I could ever possibly ask for. <3

Smile Because She Lived

2010-11-10T07:18:00.004-07:00

Sometimes it seems as if it were yesterday, when I think back to that elevator ride when my dad told me that my mom had passed away within the night.

It seems like yesterday when I had the huge lump in my throat, looking at caskets at the funeral home.

The funeral, viewing and rosary, seem only minutes ago.

But then I think back to the last day that I spent with my sweet mom, we got our nails done, went to the store, and made dinner together, it seems as if it were many years ago...much more than just two.

I think back to our last conversation, our last hug, our last 'I love you.'

We have so many memories together, many more than most mothers and daughters can claim.

I can remember lessons she taught me, I can remember gifts she gave me, and I can remember the never ending love, that I can still feel to this day.

There are so many times, that I just wish that my mom was with me. I just want to show her things, I want to have her help me with things, and I want her to see the things that I have achieved.

I want her to see me graduate college, get married and have kids. I want her to see Kimber grow up, though I know she will be with me through it all. I just wish she was here.

I miss her a lot, so much everyday! I talk to her, and I ask her for help. I just wish that I could call her up on the phone. Oh I can just imagine all the things I would tell her.

As my dad and I were at church on Sunday, it seemed as though Father Bueno was preaching directly to us, as the entire service was about life after death. At one point he read, "He is not God of the dead, for to him, everyone is living." And to me, my mom is still alive, she is just so much father away than the other side of the world.

Sometimes, I still resort back to the thoughts that this isn't real, and maybe she is just hiding, and or on vacation. Some days it's easier to feel sorry for my self and to think that life is just not fair.

But I know that all things happen for a reason. And If God brings you to it...He will bring you through it.

But at times, this journey is more than just making it through it. Sometimes it is about helping others, and letting others know that they are not alone. Sometimes losing a life is about more than just missing them, it is about their journey to heaven. I know that someday I will be reunited with me mom. And I can't wait for the day that I can hug her again. The day that she will make me laugh again.

Life is so short, and you never know when you might lose your best friend. If I can give you any advice today, tell your mom you love her, call you mom....right now. Visit as often as you can and make sure that they know just how much they mean to you.

"You can shed tears that she is gone,

or you can smile because she has lived.

You can close your eyes and pray that she'll come back

or you can open your eyes and see all she's left.

Your heart can be empty because you can't see her,

or you can be full of the love you shared.

You can remember her only that she is gone,

or you can cherish her memory and let it live on.

You can cry and close your mind,

be empty and turn your back.

Or you can do what she'd want:

smile, open your eyes, love and go on."

-David Harkins

Christmas

2010-11-02T19:36:00.002-06:00

I have been getting really excited for Thanksgiving and Christmas lately.

I even started listening to Christmas music today. =]

I have decided that this year for Christmas, I am going to make all of the gifts that I will be giving away.

I think that it will be fun, not to mention cheaper. Besides that, I think that the stuff I make, usually turns out better than things you can find in the stores, and because it's from the heart, it means more to the recipient.

I will try to keep you updated with the gifts as I make them. But some of them, I won't be able to share until after Christmas.

I already have some great ideas, I can't wait to get started. :)

We just need a little snow outside...I would love that!

Anddd Thanksgiving is only 3 weeks away, I have been looking up yummy recipes! =]

As I type this, Jerry is reading ridiculous ski patrol scenarios to me that he has made up. Oy Vey, where did I find him?

Happy November!

Happy Halloween!!

2010-10-29T13:42:00.003-06:00

I have been so busy lately with school. I keep thinking of things I want to post about, but I never seem to find the time to post about them.

In the last few weeks I have,

...creating a 5 day unit on Community Helpers, I will be teaching it to first graders in 2 weeks.

...visited my sister, Kimber and Jay. My sweet sister celebrated her 26th birthday. My whole life she has been calling me her 'little sister'. And I'm afraid that even though now at age 21 and 26, there doesn't seem to a huge age difference, I will always be her little sister, and I'm okay with that. :)

...finally finished paying off this semester of tuition. Today was my last payment, hallelujah.

...cleaned my house, while I was so busy with school, the house became a disaster.

Well, I know I have done more, but I just can't think of it right now.

I want to wish you a very Happy Halloween. Have a safe, but scary night. :)

Prince Charming

2010-10-14T23:08:00.002-06:00

Lately, my Jerold Dean has been so sweet. First of all, he bought me my all time favorite movie. It came out of the Disney Vault last week. He even watched it with me. Someday, I will tell all of you why this movie is so special to me. :)

And tonight, I walked in my bedroom to find this, do you see it? Those big beautiful pink roses?! He even killed the spider that he brought in with them. :)

Oh how lucky I am to have him in my life. I couldn't ask for a better best friend, boyfriend and prince charming. :)

Anymore

2010-10-13T15:04:00.002-06:00

One day a woman's husband died, and on that clear, cold morning, in the warmth of their bedroom, the wife was struck with the pain of learning that sometimes there isn't "anymore".

No more hugs, no more special moments to celebrate together, no more phone calls just to chat, no more "just one minute."

Sometimes, what we care about the most gets all used up and goes away, never to return before we can say good-bye, say "I love you."

So while we have it, it's best we love it, care for it, fix it when it's broken and heal it when it's sick.

This is true for marriage.....And old cars... And children with bad report cards, and dogs with bad hips, and aging parents and grandparents. We keep them because they are worth it, because we are worth it.

Some things we keep -- like a best friend who moved away or a sister-in-law after divorce. There are just some things that make us happy, no matter what.

Life is important, like people we know who are special.. And so, we keep them close!

Suppose one morning you never wake up, do all your friends know you love them?

I received this from a good friend. I know that this holds true, always.

I just hope that all of you know that I love you.

DO a good weekend.

2010-10-07T20:05:00.002-06:00

Since the beginning of the semester, every Thursday (because we don't have class on Fridays) one of my teachers has been telling my class, "Do a good weekend." I always just thought, "hmmm that's dumb. Have a good weekend teach!" Haha...but then today I thought to myself, 'why does he say that'? So that got me thinking...

We always tell each other, "Have a good day!" "Have a good weekend." "Have a good day at school" But what will cause us to 'have' a good weekend? There isn't a promise out there that our weekend will be good. There isn't a guarantee, there isn't any assurance, or security or warranty. There is no one else out there that is going to ensure your 'good weekend'. But instead, we should "Do a good weekend."

We should [do] everything in our power to ensure that we have a good weekend....to [do] a good weekend.

Nothing in life is guaranteed, and we, ourself, should make our life enjoyable, to make it good.

To have a good life, we should do a good life. What does it mean to have a good life? To be happy? To have money? To make a difference in someone's life? All of which won't happen without action. Without a verb... [do] We must do, we must work, we must attempt, strive and sacrifice.

So [do] a good weekend, would you?

Do you know what I am going to [do] this weekend?

Jerry and I are going golfing with Bart and Rani. But first I am cleaning the highway, with Golden Key Honour Society. So if you see me on the side of I-84 between mile markers 101-103, wave, or even stop by and pick up a little trash, or at the very least, please refrain yourself from disposing of your trash at that point. :) I think we will finish off our weekend with a few chores and homework.

Do a good weekend my friends!

Baby Charles

2010-10-06T09:44:00.003-06:00

Baby Charles Bradley Leavitt was born late on October 4th. Since his birth he has been in the NICU. As of last night he has been placed on a ventilator. The nurses told his mom he is a lot happier now that he is not having to work so hard. He was also given antibiotics for an infection that they found within his little body.

Charles could use your help. Please keep this little boy in your prayers. He is already loved so much.

Believe

2010-10-05T13:04:00.003-06:00

The challenge before us is never as great as the power behind us.

As we make our way through life, there will always be challenges. Without challenges, life would be bland, nothing would have a purpose and we wouldn't have joy to celebrate.

Sometimes you just have to believe in yourself, believe in others and trust that everything will work it's way out.

There are times in our life when it would be much easier to just give up, to let go and forget. Doing the right thing isn't always easy. But we always have the strength within ourself, to overcome any situation. Sometimes this strength comes from love and other times it comes from faith.

Challenges in life make our life [[rich.]]

We all have to find that one person, that one thing, that one dream, desire, want, need that is worth fighting for. At some point in our life, we have to choose our battles. We could ask our self, "Is this worth tearing my self down over?" Knowing that in the end we will build our self back up, bigger and better than ever before.

When I woke up this morning, things were gloomy.

In more than one situation.

One of my very best friends had her baby last night. He is currently in the NICU. He is healthy, but small. He weighs 5lbs 13 oz and 19 inches long. He is a beautiful baby. And as a day old baby. He is fighting his first of many life's challenges.

We take so many things in life for granted, but if we are thankful for one thing today, let us be thankful for the challenges that life throws at us. Because if it weren't for these challenges we wouldn't be the person we are, frankly, we would be weak.

The truth is, I believe in you. I believe in the strength that you have within your self. I know that you are strong, as you have been through many of life's challenges. I believe that you deserve happiness. Do you?

2010-10-04T10:48:00.003-06:00

It's not every October day that you have the opportunity to go to the beach, with your very best friend.

Just another ordinary day.

2010-09-30T21:27:00.004-06:00

To my dismay Jerry informed me this morning at 6:57 that I had a meeting at 8. What would I do without him? His memory may fail him at times, but he remembers the important stuff.

I took a shower, got ready and headed to campus for a Golden Key Honour Society Meeting.

As I walked from the parking lot (one I won't get a ticket in), to the education building I hurried, as I was already late. Everyday I dread the hike up the hill and up to the 3rd floor of the education building, and today I had to do it twice.

As I walked up the ~~hill~~ mountain....I noticed that the sun was just coming over the mountain. It was probably about 70 degrees and I looked at the changing colors up on the mountain. I decided to take a picture, I waited until no one was on the sidewalk in front of me. I didn't want anyone thinking I was taking their picture after all. And here it is...

I would have to say, Weber State is a beautiful campus, and if my tuition is worth a penny over what I think I [[should]] have to pay for classes, at least I get a beautiful view.

And uhm...does that look a hike or what?? The building I go to is just past the stop light on the right. And the parking lot that I park at is probably a 1/4 of mile behind where this picture was taken.

Also, just to inform you....I decided to cross the street right after I took this picture. As I crossed a car came flying out of no where, (I probably should have crossed at the light, I know) I hurried and ran the rest of the way...where I ran into the Coke man. Don't worry, I excused my self and made it to my meeting...just slightly late. :)

So this Education Building...my classes are on the third floor, and man, that is a lot of stinkin' stairs...especially when you go in the basement doors....which makes it climbing to the 4th floor. Okay, I know I'm complaining, but do you ever just feel like if you give in and take the elevator, people will just assume you are a lazy person? Because if I did take the elevator, I think I would have to wear a sign around my neck that says, "I'm not lazy, you should see the mountain I just hiked!" Haha, maybe I'll try that. :)

Well, the rest of my day was pretty average. Tomorrow is Friday, I am going to meet the 1st grade class that I will be teaching for 2 weeks. I have another meeting, and some chores are calling my name. I am hoping to have time to make banana bread out of the black bananas that currently sit in my kitchen. My dad, Penny and Maddie will be here Saturday for a football game, and Maddie and I get to go swimming in the hotel swimming pool. It will be a good time.

Happy Weekend Everyone!

'Enjoy the little things in life. For one day you will look back and realize they were the big things.' -Robert Blunt

Just Enough Time To Say...

2010-09-21T11:51:00.001-06:00

Hello my friends!

I hope that you find yourself happy and healthy this Tuesday at 11:52 am. I know that I sure am!

I started back at the Daycare last week, and so far, I'm loving it. :) I sure did miss those kiddos.

I'm getting excited that Fall is on it's way, and Halloween, Thanksgiving, Winter, Christmas and snowboarding are just around the corner. I hope we can all contain our excitement! :) And with Christmas comes another end to another semester!! :))

Although, I have to say, I'm going to miss my garden, our fresh peaches, tomatoes, grapes and so much more! I can't wait to have an even bigger garden next year!

Jerry and I got to go on a picnic last weekend. We had a lot of fun, and it's nice to spend time together....with nothing to worry about. :)

In one of my classes, we endured a Ropes Course, yesterday. My leg now has a pretty blue bruise from my mission over a 13 foot wall. :)

Well, that's all for now. I'm listening to a little Billy Joel...[[Vienna]] to be exact. :) And I'm headed to class. I will find out today what grade I will be teaching for 2 weeks in November.

Laugh Your Heart Out!

My Dream

2010-09-14T22:26:00.004-06:00

I'm ready to be a teacher already, at North Elementary Second grade please.

Let me tell you a little story.

When I was 5 years old, I went to Kindergarten orientation, they asked me to draw a stick figure. I had no idea what a stick figure was. After some explaining from my sweet mom, I quickly drew the best stick figure I possibly could. And that, was my very first memory of school. Well, outside of singing "I scream, you scream, we all scream for Ice Cream" in pre-school.

My love for school grew, thanks to my kindergarten teacher Ms. Rugger. I spent two years with Ms. Rugger, and for that I am so very thankful. I have had a great love for school since that day when I was 5 years old. Every year, I would get anxious for the new school year as my parents bought me school supplies. I would pack my school supplies in my backpack and I would take them out everyday and look at them until school started. I would smell my crayons, and make sure they were in perfect order within the little box. I would organize my pencil box and sharpen my pencils. I went everyday to Kindergarten, anxious to see my new best friend Ms. Rugger. I went home with stories about her everyday, and my mom even bought us best friend Micky Mouse necklaces, you know the kind that are a split heart and fit together, because we were the very best friends.

I continued my education, I went to first grade with Mrs. Thorpe, Second Grade with Mrs. Sharp, Third Grade with Mrs. Bowcutt,Fourth Grade with Mrs. Kaufman, and in Fifth Grade I had my first male teacher, Mr. Larson. I enjoyed everyday of school, except the day I had school after school for not completing my homework, and I came sobbing to the car when my mom picked me up. I promise you, I never forgot my homework again.

I knew at an early age that I wanted to be a teacher. I use to tell my mom that I wanted to be an art teacher. It was soon apparent that my art skills were not developing at a rate that I could be a graduate from an art program, but my love for education never subsided.

And here I am, in my 3rd year of college. I go to school everyday to learn how to teach. I just can't wait until the day that I am given the keys to my very own classroom, the day that I receive my first list of students who will be with me through out the day for an entire 8-9 months of their life. I can't wait until the day, that there is a student who might possibly be my best friend, or the one student that says, "You taught me."

And what about Ms. Rugger? She's a principal in Nevada. She recently created a Facebook, and I am so very glad to keep in close touch with her. When I was in 5th grade I had the opportunity to go visit her in Nevada. We still remain close friends, and if necessary I bet she would wear that Mickey Mouse necklace with me again. :)

On the day of my high school graduation, my fifth grade teacher told me that he would wait to retire until I had my teaching license so that I could take over his job. How great that would be.

As I go through college, I imagine what my life as a teacher will be. I always imagine North Elementary. Every time I'm in Evanston, and we drive past North, I tell Jerry, "Man, I just wanna work there." Because I honestly do, I can't imagine being a teacher anywhere else.

I realize that I am being a little unrealistic, but I know that God cares about our hopes and dreams, and wherever I get the chance to be a teacher will be the right place.

Here's to my last 3 semesters in college, I will make it the best, the very best.

Money, Money, Money

2010-09-09T21:09:00.002-06:00

Why is it that our lives revolve around [money]?

We have names for people that have excess [money]....the rich...the wealthy, possibly the better off?

And those with lack of [money]...the poor...the less fortunate.

When we are born our parents have huge [expenses] for our birth, for our new life, our clothes, food and shelter.

These expenses continue until we reach a point in our life in which we can obtain our own job, and earn [money].

At time of our high school graduation we begin considering how we will enter the world as a fresh young adult. We then decide, will I enter the work force and begin a family? Will my job provide enough [money], for me to support a family?

Some of us choose to go to college, but in order to go to college, we are expected to make an investment in our self, this investment costs thousands of [dollars.] Some of us may decide that we do not have the [money] to pay for college, so we then take out loans. A loan, that we expect we will be able to pay back, with the [money] that we hope to make as a worker with a college degree.

From that point forward, we go to work in cars that we put gas in, using the [money] that we earn.

We have children, we buy houses, cars, entertainment systems and anything that we feel will make our life ((richer)).

We pay to get married.

We fight over money and possessions as we get a divorce.

We save. We earn. We spend. We donate. We waste.

We waste our life, over [money].

I realize that money is crucial to human survival at this point in America.

But what does it truly mean to be rich?

To me,

watching the sunset, as I sit on the beach with my family, that makes me rich.

Having a relationship with my dad, where I can tell him everything, that makes me rich.

Making dinner and enjoying it with Jerry,that makes me rich.

I am rich because I have friends and family that celebrate with me when I'm at the top and encourage me when I'm at the bottom.

Rich is, spending 19 years of your life, with a mother who loves you, unconditionally.

Talking to God, knowing he understands. Believing in yourself. Loving, caring, inspiring.

These are the things, that make me rich.

Money will always be a struggle. But life, is not a struggle, as long as your willing to look past the burden of money, the burden of possessions and look to see where you are the richest.

Kimber Barrett Roberts

2010-08-23T21:20:00.004-06:00

I have really neglected my blog lately. Sometimes my life is just so busy to record, but nonetheless, a lot has happened.

Firstly, and possibly most importantly, my neice, my princessa, my favorite little baby was born.

Kimber Barrett Roberts was born July 29, 2010 at 5:36 PM. She weighed 8 pounds 8 ounces.

She is absolutely

perfect! I love her.

It's amazing how you wait for 9 months, for this little person to join your life, and you imagine the entire time what she might look like, or how her personality may form, but we can never imagine just how perfect, such a little tiny person can be.

My dad, Penny and I, drove to Jackson, Wyoming to welcome baby Kimber in the world. I was so anxious to meet her. I know that my mom is so excited to be a grandma.

Last week I got to go stay with Jessica and Kimber for an entire week!

I got to hold, and feed and cuddle with the baby the entire time.

I had to come back to Ogden today for school, oh how I will miss that baby. I sure do love her.

Someday, I know that we will be the best of friends. I can't wait to see her grow and develop, and become an amazing person.

She is just so absolutely perfect already.

I love her.

The worst nights sleep ever.

2010-07-26T21:01:00.002-06:00

Last night, I could not sleep....for the life of me.

I tossed and turned, and rotated my pillow. I tried sleeping close to Jerry, and on the edge of the bed. I listened to the music that was playing, and I tried to ignore it. But nothing I did seemed to work. I began thinking of my mom, and cried a little. I just kept thinking about the things in life that I wish she was here to experience with me. I prayed, for my dad, for my future, and for Jerry, Penny, Jessica, Jay and baby Kimber too. I asked my mom to give me a hug, as I have many times before. I thought a lot about work, and money, and school and life.

I kept thinking, everyday, for five days, Jerry and I...

Wake up, shower, brush our teeth, drive to work, work, drive home from work, eat dinner, watch tv, and go to bed.

Some days we add in some laundry, or dishes or a drive around town. But overall, we work, we work so that we can live. However, I don't think we should live to work.

I know that for many many reasons, work is crucial in our life. It is important to learn to work hard and to work hard for the things we want most in life. It is important to work, to support our self, and our family. However, I just feel that there is more to life than working. I'm not saying, "Quit your job, you're wasting your time." I'm just saying, if we are going to spend 5/7ths of our week doing something, let's make it something worth while. Yes, I do think I will graduate from college. :)

So, every once in a while, I write a blog, I think, "Man, how stupid. Maybe I should just delete that, and forget it." And that's how I feel tonight. But, for tonight, I'll post.

Oh, and to finish off my sleepless night, Jerry has a horrible, annoying, consistent, hacking, cough. And so, for those moments, when my mind wasn't running, he was coughing. ay.ay.ay

In other news:

*My dad and I are leaving for Jackson, WY to welcome baby Kimber on Wednesday. I just can't wait!

*It looks like rain out. :) I love that!

*Jerry and I only have about a month until Fall semester starts, crazy? Yes.

Well, I guess I just don't have much to say, or at least not as much as I had thought. And not even any pictures. Should I even post....

I hope that you have the best night's sleep tonight. Good night my friends!

2010-07-21T21:18:00.004-06:00

Happy Wednesday!

So, remember this Lady???

*Her due date is July 24. So we have been waiting, and waiting.....and still more waiting.

She had an appointment today. They decided that if the baby doesn't come by next Wednesday, my sister sue will be induced next Wednesday at 5 pm! Yahoo! I can't wait for my little niece to get here.

[[May you follow your dreams and always believe in yourself, keep your eyes on the stars, and hope in your heart.]]

*When I was a freshman in college, my mom came to visit one day, and decided that my little dorm needed a little life! So she bought me the cutest little plant. About six months, I re-potted it, because it was growing so big. And I decided to leave the plant at my house in Evanston, because it was too big for my dorm. Well, about a week and a half ago, I looked at the plant, it this is how it looked. :( I was heart broken. This is the plant my mom gave me. Plants can live forever if taken care of properly, and I had every intention to keep it alive...forever. But look at it? I re-potted it again today. I gave it some plant food, oh how I hope it makes a come back! Rani tells me it needs some TLC, and tender loving care it will get!

[[A memory is a way of holding on to the things you love, the things you are, and the things you never want to lose.]]

*I chipped my tooth last Friday, while at the movie theater, eating a life saver. Today it was fixed!! Hallelujah!!

[[May you have enough happiness to make you sweet, enough trials to make you strong, enough sorrow to keep you human, enough hope to make you happy.]]

*It was a beautiful night tonight in Ogden!

[[The happiest people don't have the best of everything. They just make the best of everything.]]

Welcome to our house!

2010-07-12T21:45:00.005-06:00

I have been meaning to post pictures of our little house for a while now. So here it is. We live up behind another house, our drive way is steep and this is the view from the drive way.

I took this picture tonight. This is the front door, and my little flower garden. :) I made the wreath on the door today too. :) Oh and Jer's cute little BBQ.

This is the flower garden to the left of the front door. :)

This is a view from the side of the house, the entire house is surrounded by plants. That's what I love most!

This is the heater, ha. I was a little bummed about this 'eye sore', but I think it looks okay, in the plant camo. ;)

This is our cute little kitchen table. There really is no real dining area, so we put the table in the corner of the living room. One of my favorite things about having my own house is getting fresh flowers to put on the table. :)

This is our living room. Bart and Rani bought us the couch, and my dad gave us the

TV.

This is our bed room. We bought the shelves next to the bed for $15 each at Wal Mart, what a deal huh!

This is another view of the living room, from the kitchen. :)

This is the view of the kitchen from the living room.

Although the house is really old, the kitchen was newly remodeled.

My absolute favorite thing about this house is the garden. There is so much growing and so much that I have never seen grow in my entire life. This is a picture of the blueberry bush. I took the picture in the dark, so it's not the best.

These are green grapes. They are everywhere. We could each a bunch of grapes everyday until Winter and we would never run out.

These are peaches! I can't wait until they are ready to eat. :)

These are raspberries. I ate one today and it was soooo good!

Jerry planted two tomato plants. This was our first tomato to sprout now we have about 6.

Jerry also planted jalapeños. This one is almost ready!

Well, that's it. It's a tiny house, but we don't need anything big. I am proud of this little house. I love everything about it. The entire drive way and house is surrounded by trees. We even have a few apple trees. This is a view of a sun set. Isn't it beautiful?

Three Year Olds

2010-07-08T17:19:00.002-06:00

Today I was in the 3 year old classroom....ALL DAY!

Forget Terrible Twos.

The three year olds have something about them. They are stinkin' cute! They're cuddly. And they say the cutest things!

BUT, when you get more than one of them together, all a sudden they turn into little monsters!

And they're smart. They know how to manipulate, they know how to annoy and they most definitely know how to get revenge.

Just imagine if we all live our lives the way three year olds do.

We would hit, kick, scream, spit and cry to get what we want.

When we are asked to take a time out, for a tiny 3 minutes, we will throw our self on the floor and then throw the chair that we are placed on.

We would fight sleep, even when our eyes couldn't possibly stay open another minute. We will then insist that in order to sleep we need our shoes, cup, favorite blanket, stuffed animal, latest art project, socks, hair ribbons and a random fork at our side.

When we don't get the toy we want to play with we will find the person with the toy that we want and we will hit them, bite them, kick them and spit on them.

We would gargle our milk at meal time, and dunk all food in milk before eating it.

We would play in the toilets, sinks and any other forbidden thing we could reach.

We would always be saying, "Teacher 'so&so' just hit me."

In order to get revenge we would tell our friends, "Get him!", and point out the victim.

Because honestly, that is how three olds act, when they are in groups of 5 or more at daycare.

Some days, like today, they push me right to edge, and then I think, what the heck? I love kids, why are they making me so crazy.

But at the end of the day, when my shift is over and they come to hug me good bye, I forget all the things that irritated me. And I still love them....

So please, don't act a three year eh?

A day on the boat...

2010-07-01T18:54:00.010-06:00

If only the entire world had a boat...

So that the entire world could spend time in a confined space with the people they love most.

So that the entire world could enjoy the beauty of God's creation.

So that the entire world could sit, and reflect.

If the entire world had a boat, maybe we would be in slightly better shape. ;)

Because, my family has a boat...

We spend time, laughing without a care in the world.

It's a chance to forget anything that has worried us, the days, weeks, months and years before.

It's a chance to get to know each other, on another level.

It's a chance to just let go, to be free, to jump in.

Happy Thursday my friends!

Go Boating!!

Happy Birthday To My Sweet Momma!

2010-06-17T15:50:00.003-06:00

Today started out normal, because after all it is just another day.

But is it? I mean, 52 years ago today, my momma was born. And that day changed my life, of course, because if she wasn't born I wouldn't have been either. But she changed my life in so many more ways than just that.

She was my best friend, she was my advocate, she listened and believed in me. She taught me to love, she taught me to cook, she made me who I am. She was my mom. I'm not sure that anyone will ever understand me the way she does. She truly cherished everyday. She always let me know that she loved me. She could always make me laugh. I have never been so close to anyone else in my life, and I probably never will be.

But just because she has left my this earth, she isn't out of my world, she isn't out of my life, and she most definitely isn't out of my thoughts. I know exactly how she would respond to every situation, I guess that just comes from knowing her so well. I still talk to her daily, I still feel her, and I still learn from her. I still have the best memories to cherish.

If I were to ask God to explain, maybe he would say, "I needed her more." "I gave you a life time worth of memories in 19 years." or maybe he would say, "You will see her again some day, and it will be as if she never left." I much more believe in the third possibility.

The fact is, she is not physically here, I have come to accept that, as hard as it was. But I know, that her spirit is never far. And I feel peace knowing that.

I was so lucky to have my sweet Mom on this earth with me for 19 years. And forever in my heart.

Happy birthday sweet mom! You are the most beautiful angel, the most perfect mom, and the worlds best friend. Thank you for all that you have given me.

To celebrate her birthday I will be making stuffed bell peppers for dinner. She taught me how to make them. :D

**Proof she's here: Today while I was coming from work on my break, my radio wouldn't work. So I pushed play on my CD player, I never listen to it, because I always have the radio on, I don't even know the last time I listened to a CD. Anyway, I pushed play, and loudly, John Mayer began playing. My mom and I LOVE John Mayer. I can remember the first time we heard the song, we were on our way to Salt Lake. But they didn't say who the song was by, a few days later, my mom heard the song again, and she called the radio station to see who the artist was. What are the chances that my radio wouldn't work, on her birthday, and that John Mayer was in the CD player? She was there.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOM!

As the tulips bloom, the birds chirp, the fresh air blows ...

2010-06-10T17:25:00.005-06:00

There are millions of reason why I love Summer time.

As I drove to Ogden the other day, I thought, no wonder God created seasons. He created them so that we could appreciate the change. I always love summer after a cold long winter, but after Summer, I get anxious for Fall and a snowy Winter. It's a fresh start, it's a new portrait, it's a makeover, it's a new beginning, and we are forever reminded to appreciate all that we have been given.

I love it when the mountains are covered in snow, yet the hills below are covered in fresh green grass.

I love painting my toe nails and wearing flip flops!

I love eating ice cream on a hot day!

I am thankful that I can decorate my Mom's grave with beautiful flowers, and spend time alone with her, talking, in the beautiful sun.

I love the baby animals that are scattered along the country side.

I love the fresh breeze that blows through my window on the days that it is warm enough to roll down the windows.

I love planting a garden and watching it grow.

I love sitting on the porch and enjoying the company of those I love most.

I am thankful for this beautiful season.

I love the blooming plants, flowers, grass and tress.

I am thankful for the colorful sunsets, that remind me of my beautiful momma.

I am thankful for the rain followed by rainbows and the fresh smell of the wet dirt.

I hope that you are enjoying your summer as much as I am enjoying mine.

Jerry just said to me, "Let's go." I asked, "Where?" He said, "I have reservations for dinner."

I know what you're thinking.....what a sweet guy.

Unfortunately, he then said, "Just kidding." Rude huh? He just tried using that little trick to get my on the computer faster. Ha! I think he owes me dinner, don't you?

My 21st Birthday Bash Surprise!

2010-06-03T17:44:00.006-06:00

The day started out with some shopping with my sweet sissy! We went to Park City; we went in every baby store that exist!! We bought so much stuff, including a onesie that says, "My aunt is my BFF" I love it! During the day, Jerry asked me if I wanted to have dinner at his dad's house, of course I agreed, I love spending time with Bart and Rani. However, I'm such a planner, we had previous plans to go see my dad and Penny, at a party that they would be working at that night. So my plan was to get back around 5 or 5:30, visit my dad and Penny for a few minutes, then go to Bart and Rani's for dinner at 6. I invited my sister to have dinner with us at Bart and Rani's as well. We headed back to Evanston around 4:30. As we arrived to the building that my dad and Penny were suppose to be working at. As we got out of the car, my land lord called. I was so excited because we were finding out what day we could move into our little house. My phone died, and I never got to finish the conversation. I saw Jeff (Jerry's step dad's) truck, and said to Jessica, "That's Jeff's truck, they must be at Hunan." I walked up the stairs to the building, and opened the door, and at that very moment, every one said, "Surprise!!" And what did I do? I shut the door! I thought that I had ruined someone elses' surprise party. In fact, the very first thing that came to mind was--"Now everyone in town has a picture of me, ruining the surprise!" Anyway, as I shut the door, Jessica pushed me back in. I was so surprise, and pleasantly surprised at that!

This is the only picture that we have of me walking in the door.

One of the best gifts! Uncle Curt came, oh how I've missed him!

I was so shocked to see my family from Washington. And my family from Big Piney, and all of the people in the world that mean the most to me. I just love it. Actually, as I think back to it, it even makes me a little emotional. How many times in your life, is everyone you love, all in one building, and all in that building for you?! I just couldn't possibly be more blessed. And I don't even know how to express my thanks!

So here's a try-

Penny, Thank you so much for planning this party. It was the absolute best. I couldn't be more thankful. You mean so much to me. I can't tell you how much I appreciate all the hard work you put in for me. You are such a special person.

Dad, Thank you so much for being my daddy! Thank you for dancing with me the entire night through. Thank you for making me the kid I am today. I will always be your little kid, and more importantly, you will always be my daddy and my best friend. I love you.

I was so excited to see my Aunt Sherida and Uncle Bruce!

Roy, Darlene, and Amanda,

Thank you so much for making all the food and cupcakes, for my party. It was so delicious. We really owe you one! Thank you so much for being a part of my life always. I love you guys!

Pete, Thanks so much for a fun day shopping. I loved it! I loved spending time with you, and I can't wait to see Kimber in all those clothes!

Everyone who came, Thank you so much for celebrating my birthday with me. You all mean so very much to me, and I couldn't have asked for a better group of people to be there with me. I hope that we can get together more often. You are the very best....the very best!

We finished up the night by chatting, drinking, dancing and just all around partying. It was so fun. Penny and my dad thought of everything. There was a bar, a band, food and best of all the people I love! I wish that it could have lasted a whole week! It all went by so fast. It couldn't have been any more perfect!

My dad is the cutest!

Oh I just loved it!

My New Job

2010-05-25T17:02:00.003-06:00

I have been working at Discovery Clubhouse for about 4 and a half weeks now. I have learned so much. I think that it will be very beneficial to work with these young kids, before becoming an elementary teacher. It takes a lot of patience, that's for sure. But working with kids, is all I ever want to do. I don't get paid much, in fact, barely over minimum wage, but I love it. I think that having a job that you enjoy is more important than making a lot of money, in a job that you hate.

My day at work starts out at 6 AM. When I get there, there are already about 5 kids. Some sleep and some watch a movie. The teacher that gets there before me, takes the kids under age 2 into another room. From around 6 until 7:30, I have all kids, ages 2-12. By 7:30 I watch up to 30 kids. This part of the day, is my least favorite, it feels so out of control. At 7:30, the school age kids and the preschoolers go to their own classrooms. I am then left with 2 and 3 year olds. I only have about 6 of them at this point. We clean up the room, and then go to another classroom, where we play until 9:30 when they eat breakfast. I feed about 16 kids breakfast, and then another teacher comes in to give me a break. By this point I'm so ready for a break. After my break, I go into which ever room they need me in, which lately, has been the 2 year olds. I love them!

These are 2 year olds, they were playing nice for once.

Let me give you a few highlights-

*Yesterday, the 2 and 3 year olds were sitting down for breakfast. I was serving cereal. The kids were all telling me where their Mommy's were. Most kids said, "My mommy is at work." One little girl said, "My mom is in jail." Another said, "My mommy is sick." And then a little boy said, "My mommy is an angel." So I said, "So is mine." The boy looked back at me and said, "Really? You're mommy is in heaven too?" It was so sweet! I can't imagine losing my mom at age 3. The little boy and I have always been buddies, but even more now. Today he asked me, "So, your mom's in heaven?" I think he likes the connection. :)

Playing with Play dough. Love these girls!

*There is a little boy that teachers have been telling me was a problem child from the first day I worked there. For the first days that I worked with me, I treated him as a problem child. And he would throw tantrums. He would hit and bite other kids, and throw toys. I didn't know what to do. So about a week ago, I decided I was just going to treat him like the other kids, and it has worked so well. He still has tantrums. But now instead of getting mad, or trying to put him in time out, I pick him up, and ask him to play with me. He has become so much better. But starting today, he wants me to hold him all the time. I told him that he is too big, but he just cries. He will hold my legs, and won't let go. When I left for my break today, he started crying and was banging on the gate. I think the poor little guy just needs attention.

*I have changed soo many diapers.

*There is a little black girl who HATES me. I don't think she has seen anyone so white before. Ugh, and I don't think her dad likes me either, he never wants to leave her with me.

Anyway, the job is going good. :) I have so much fun, and time goes by so fast. It's a good experience, and I really love to be with all those kiddos.

Who Made the Moon?

2010-05-23T12:53:00.004-06:00

On Friday night Bart and Rani, picked up Jerry and I, and we headed to Wendover. For our 21st birthdays, Bart and Rani were taking us to a Little River Band concert. I was really pretty excited about it because my parents have always listened to the Little River Band. We began the concert with some drinks, and we would yell, and watch the people dance around us, some of them were quite comical.

After a few songs, the lead singer began telling us (the audience) about a man that has been to 99 Little River Band concerts. The Wendover concert was his 99th. He continued by telling us that the man had been begging the band to play a song called "Who made the Moon" for the last 60 concerts. The singer told us that they hadn't played the song at a concert and the song was only on one of their albums. I had never head of the song and I was glad that we got to hear it. All of the other members of the band, except for the keyboard player, and the lead singer left the stage. The lead singer was all choked up, and had a hard time beginning the song. And the song began...

Her little eyes looked up to the evening sky
As twilight spread across her sweet face she wondered why
She turned to me to ask who made it so
So sure that I would know
Who made the moon, who paints the sky
Who hangs the stars and turns them on each night
Who tells the rose it's time to bloom
How do Junebugs know it's June
Dad, who made the moon
As that little girl grew up to discover life
She found that people's words could cut deeper than a knife
But somehow hers were always used for good
I guess she understood
Who made the moon, who paints the sky
Who hangs the stars and turns them on each night
Who fills the hearts, that have no room
With shooting stars and toy balloons
Dad, who made the moon
And who decides who gets to live
And who decides its time to die
And who decides the ones you love
Don't get to say goodbye
Now I sit alone and search the evening sky
I'd give everything I'll ever own for just one more night
To hold her close and share the mystery
And hear her asking me
Who made the moon, who paints the sky
Who hangs the stars and turns them on each night
Who shows the world how to play in tune
She got her answers way too soon
She knows who made the moon
Who made the moon, who paints the sky
Who hangs the stars and turns them on each night
How can I fill this empty room
Why'd she have to leave so soon
God, who made the moon

It was one of the prettiest songs that I have ever heard. But it was so sad. It reminded me of my mom. I had the biggest lump in my throat the entire concert. I managed to keep the tears in, until the song was over, but I just kept thinking about that song. Rani reached over and gave me a hug, and that was it, I began to cry. I was so embarrassed. I didn't want everyone to see me cry. Jerry gave me a hug, and I nestled my head into his chest so that no one could see. I was so embarrassed.

And I think the song is now one of my favorites. You should all go listen to it.

It all really hit home for me. I have always considered things, such as, the moon and the stars as proof that there is a god. In the song, the singers daughter dies, and finds out, who made the moon, who paints the stars, and who hangs the stars and turns them on each night. In the same sense, my mom has met the Creater of this world. Although she has died young, she knows the answers to all the questions we may have on earth, including why she was taken so early in her life.

To finish off our trip, we gambled a little and headed home. It was so much fun, and an eye opening experience, thanks to the song. In so many ways, I think that I was meant to hear that song. It was the FIRST time they had ever played that song during a concert. It was the mega fan's 99t concert! Everything happens for a reason. Everything happens for a reason!!

I'd give everything I'll ever own for just one more night

So much blogging, so little time.

2010-05-21T15:27:00.003-06:00

Don't worry. I haven't forgotten you.

I have been so busy. And...we haven't had Internet for a couple of weeks.

Jerry and I are waiting for Bart and Rani to get here, we are headed to Wendover. :) Whoo!

So I don't have a lot of time to blog. But I have so much I want to write about. And lots of pictures too! :) So stay tuned eh??

In the real close future I plan to tell you all about...

Our new house!

My new job!

My huge surprise birthday bash!

My Kindergarten Teacher, who just got Facebook!

Shopping with Jessica!

And of course, a little about my beautiful Momma!

And I've thought about a few other things I want to share, but I need to catch up first!

Tonight Jers and I will be at the Little River Band concert in Wendover with Bart and Rani, they're the best. We will be coming back tomorrow night. Sunday we are getting Direct Tv installed at our house, and then we will be going to Jordan and Ryan's wedding reception...Love them! I hope you have the best weekend. Enjoy some sun!

I'll leave you with this...

When Life Gives you Lemons

2010-04-30T17:40:00.003-06:00

Today, while I was driving home from Ogden alone, I thought a lot about things.

It is scientifically proven, that every action has a positive or negative reaction.

In life, our every action, has a positive or negative consequence.

It is for us to decide;

We can, learn from the experience, we can grow and essentially make good choices in our future. We can teach those around us, not to make the same mistakes that we have made.

Or, we can dwell on the situation, feeling sorry for our self, and blaming others. And in time, we will once again continue to make the same mistakes.

It's not for me to tell you, how you should feel, what things you should and should not do.

With that being said, I feel that it is important for us to experience the consequences of our actions. It frustrates me when, we (as in all humans) are "bailed out" of our consequences. We become cheated, out of a life lesson, one that will teach us, from that point forward. A lesson that will teach us to become better, to become our best!

If Johnny hits his brother, and his mother tells him he must tell his brother sorry, and then sit in the corner for 5 minutes, Johnny will learn that hitting his brother is unacceptable, he will learn that his actions, has a negative result, and he will no longer hit his brother.

However, if Johnny's father decides to take Johnny out of the corner, Johnny will never gain the experience of being punished. He will continue to hit his brother.

This happens through life,

When someone goes to jail, they can be bailed out.

If we spend more money than we have and go into debt, we can file bankruptcy.

If we can't pay for college, the government will pay for it.

In fact, in all life situations, there is a bail out. What incentive is there to do the right thing anymore? If there is always someone there to catch us when we fall, why should we even try to stand alone?

Why should we tell the truth, when we are expected to lie?

Why should we practice to become a good baseball player, if everyone makes the team.

Why should we keep score at those baseball games, if the parents will be upset when their child loses, and essentially they will deem all players as winners.

Someone has to lose, in order to win. Someone has to lose in order to have the incentive to win.

I don't think we should bail each other out of consequences. We shouldn't cheat someone out of a lesson. We shouldn't take away the chance to become a better person.

Why not,

Be our own best friend.

Work hard, everyday.

Work to make money, to support our selves.

Accept the consequences of our actions.

Always tell the truth.

Overuse "I love you."

Say Thank you.

Pray to God.

Never accept a bailout.

Be there for your friends and family. Don't bail them out of the lessons in life. There is a reason that every action has a positive or negative reaction.

Be proud of the person you see in the mirror everyday. If you're not, you're doing something wrong.

Have faith in yourself!

A Giveaway

2010-04-30T17:29:00.001-06:00

Have you ever been to CSN.com? It's the best. Lots of neat stuff. There is a giveaway on another blog for a $50 giftcard.

Check it out here!

I just need to get my foot in the door.

2010-04-26T10:30:00.002-06:00

Or maybe both feet, as my Uncle Curt would say.

It seems like there are plenty of jobs I'm willing to do, I mean if someone called to have me pick up dog poop in the back yard, and would pay me for it, I would do it.

But out of the 239872930319832497384 jobs I have applied for, nothing seems to work.

I'm part time....they need full time.

There are 2 hours a day that I need to be in school....they say there is no way, we can work around those 2 hours.

Must have experience, it's hard to get experience if no one gives you a chance.

Must have a Utah drivers license.

I have 2 trips and 2 baby showers that fill my weekends of May, must work all weekends.

Graveyard shifts...psh, like I'm going to do that in Ogden, with all the gangs, not to mention I have school everyday.

I could drive to Salt Lake for a job, but it's far.

I could babysit, but it's not reliable enough.

No one trusts anyone in Ogden. In Evanston, everyone knows you, and knows that your a good hardworking person. Not in Ogden.

Well, it'll come. With a little faith, right?

I have two interviews tomorrow. Keep your fingers crossed would you?

Faith

2010-04-22T00:34:00.005-06:00

Some days, having faith is harder than others.

Some days having faith just means getting out of bed, to try again.

Faith may be giving second chances.

Praying to God, that's faith.

Knowing everything has a way of working it's self out...faith!

Looking on the bright side...

Seeing the glass half full....

Going against the odds...

Supporting the underdog...

Taking chances...

Believing in miracles....

Faith. Faith. Faith.

And just a little goes a long way.

Believe in your dreams.

Set goals, and reach them.

Support others and always give second chances...people change.

Finish strong at the end of the semester.

Apply for one more job, it could be the one!

Trust that cars can be repaired, with a reasonable amount of money.

Everything will be okay, if ~~You~~ I just have a little faith.

And I do.

Kimber is coming!

2010-04-21T14:34:00.002-06:00

We went to see some family this weekend. Jerry and I stayed with Jessica and Jay. I was so glad to see them. And I was excited to see Jessica's big belly, Kimber is definitely on her way. I can't wait for her to get here.

Steeler loves the baby belly. But I think he has a big surprise coming for him when he realizes he won't be the center of attention anymore.

I think he'll adjust okay though. He'll be a good big brother!

You are my sunshine

2010-04-14T18:15:00.003-06:00

It's been a good day. A good day full of blessings. I have realized that life is precious. It's nice to spend time savoring the moment, spending time with those you love and just breathing in, fresh, warm air.

Last night, I scrambled to get everything done for today, including a major project, a 12 page psychology paper, a earthquakes worksheet and lesson plan to be implemented in class. stayed up until 1 am last night and work at 6:30 this morning. I got everything finished, one time, and I feel that I did a good job.

As I went to bed last night, at 1 am, I began thinking about our little house, did I mention that we got it?! I am so excited about it! I can't stop thinking about how I want to decorate it, I want to have some flowers out side, I want to have our own little place. I am so excited about it!

Jerry picked me up from class today, and I was so relieved to be done with so many big assignments. He had all the windows down and the sun roof open. I took a deep breath and told him it was warm! I asked him if we could get a slushee from 7-11. So we began driving. We passed a few 7-11's and just kept driving. We drove north for miles. We saw some incredibly big houses, we talked about being little, and spending the summer outside on our bikes, we decided that we miss it! It was so nice to just drive around together, carefree. Jerry pulled off the side of the rode, and we could see the whole Salt Lake Valley. It was refreshing. I love days like today.

I am overwhelmed with love and compassion. I feel as though I am the luckiest girl. I just want everyone to know how much I appreciate them.

Jerry, Jerold, Jers-Thank you so much for being my best friend. Thank you for laughing at my jokes, and telling me that everything will be okay. Thank you for driving me around Ogden, to look at giant houses. Thank you for being the one person that is always there fore me, everyday.

Dad- Thanks for calling me everyday, and for loving me as much as you do. You'll always be my best friend, you know? You are the sweetest, best dad in the entire world, and I couldn't have made it here without you.

Penny- Thanks for caring about me. Thank you for the sweet emails, and for taking an interest in my life. I can't tell you how much I appreciate you. You are one special person. Thanks for being my friend.

Uncle Curt- I miss you so much. Thank you for sending me holiday cards, and caring about my schooling. You're the best uncle any kid could ask for.

Pete- Thanks for being the best sister in the world. I can't wait to spend time with you this weekend!

Blog friends- Thank you for reading my stories, my fears, my pride and my rants. You're the best.

Spring has sprung!

Happy Wednesday!

Oh the Memories

2010-04-12T16:26:00.005-06:00

It's days like today that just thinking about old memories has me on the verge of tears. It has been a gloomy day. Jerry found out that his car is still broken, and he is thinking about selling it. Neither of us have heard from jobs and we rescheduled the meeting with the land lord. It's cloudy outside, and looks like it will probably rain.

I was going through my sent emails today, and found emails that my mom sent me. Just reading them makes me miss her, but I can hear her saying the things that she wrote. I miss having my mom send me emails, just to tell me hello, and that she missed me. I love that sweet Momma of mine and I will never ever ever forget how much she means to me. She was such a special lady.

Sometimes I wonder if other people think about their mom as often as I think about mine. I mean, when I really get down in the dumps, I talk to her. When I'm upset and Jerry asks me what's wrong, I tell him, "I just want my mom." Sometimes I talk to her. Sometimes I tell her to make me study. There are times when I question what she is doing at that very minute. There are times that I wonder what she would say about things like, the little house Jerry and I want to move into or the grades I am getting. I go to weddings and can't help but think how hard it will be for me to get married without my mom, in fact sometimes just thinking about having a wedding ceremony makes me consider not having one, because I know it will be so emotional...yet I still want one. I think about my mom when I am buying stuff for my soon-to-be niece Kimber. She would be so stinkin' excited about it.

I think about her everyday. And it's days like today, that I wish she was here so we could just talk, or for her to give me a hug and kiss me on my forehead. I wish she was here to tell me what Stanley and B were doing. I miss her.

While I was in France, my mom wrote me this message. I found it today, it sure is special.

Hi Colie

I am at work and I downloaded incredimail so when you e-mail me today I will get an instant message so I can e-mail you back so watch for my reply. We had Easter Dinner at Richards it was good just the Grandma and the son were there no Dee. B & Stanley slept outside last night. It is going to be over 50 degrees here today! You should get some perfume for Dad he is all out. Well have you been sleeping in your own bed? Or who do you share with. How is the food? Bring me a decoration. Love you lots!

MOM

This was dinner right after I got home from France. She was so excited for me to be home. It was the most time that we had ever spent apart.

I miss her.

Every Dog Has His Day.

2010-04-11T21:06:00.003-06:00

And I'm hoping our day is tomorrow.

A few weeks ago, Jerry and I got this fortune, in our fortune cookie, of course. Yes, we got the exact same fortune. Coincidence? I don't think so. Because well, sometimes I'm a little superstitious. Or maybe it's just that I have enough faith in God (and my mom), to believe that they would send me a little reminder, not to give up.

And I'm not giving up, nope. Not one single bit has my faith subsided. I still believe, with all my heart that, things have a way of working them selves out. With a little faith, prayer and perseverance, Jerry and I will get our little house, we will get a job, and we will pay for our college without student loans. It'll happen.

I hope tomorrow is our day. Jerry is suppose to call Henry Day Ford to see if he has the job. I'm expecting a call from the Timbermine, and tomorrow night, we have a meeting with the Land Lord of the little house to pay the deposit. Oh, I hope it's OUR little house!

If you find yourself struggling through something, and your on the verge of giving up, I want you to know, that everything has a way of working it's self out. Life is not out to get you. It will happen, give it some time, give it a little prayer. Have a little faith.

"Focus on your long term goal. Good things will soon happen."

Bad Day!

2010-04-10T08:07:00.003-06:00

Yesterday, Jerry woke up around 7, to shower and go to work. He works a full day on Fridays because he doesn't have school. I got up around 8, to take a shower and get ready for school. At around 8:15, I text him to tell him to have a good day at work and that I loved him. He said something like, I love you too. Apparently there was a meeting yesterday and the new boss told everyone how he doesn't like me. So I asked him a little about it, and then he said, I guess he is firing me. To go back a little real quick, on Thursday, Jerry and I, turned in applications and paid a fee to get a credit and criminal background check. Anyway, so when I heard that he was getting fired, I was kind of upset, because we had put on the application that he had this job. Anyway, Jerry was upset, and left to go to get this mom's car so that he could take his tool box home. As he was on the interstate his car broke down. He called me, but he was so angry that I couldn't understand what he was saying. Finally, I got it all figured out. But I was still mad so I just told him that I had to go to class, and I got off the phone. A few minutes later I decided to skip class, and try to help him out. So I called him, and he said that he, got his car to start back up, and drove back to the shop, of the job he had just lost. He found that his catalyk converter, was broken and needed to be replaced. For a mere $500. :O The part will be here on Monday. Because it was Friday night, we had plans to drive back to Evanston to hang out with our families. Thankfully, Jerry's mom came to pick us up. We got back to Evanston, and I got a call from the Land Lord, of the house we are trying to rent, she told me that our background and credit was approved. But then, she said to me, "I just called the Timbermine, and they said you don't work there yet." I had an interview on Tuesday with the Timbermine, and they told me that they would call me with a schedule this week. I figured that meant I had the job?! So the Landlord, told me that it was okay, but that I would need to get her my first pay check stub when I got one. I agreed, and we hung up. But I felt horrible, like she thought I was a liar. We set up a date to pay the deposit for Monday. So Jerry and I went to Wal-Mart to pick up a wedding present, and while we were there, Jerry got a call from the Land Lord, and she said that she had called Jerry's work, and they said that he doesn't work there anymore. Jerry explained to her that, he no longer worked there, but that he had a job interview at Henry Day Ford on Thursday. Ay, ay, ay. The lady probably thinks we are liars, and cheats. And the truth is, we didn't lie once. It was just a sucky day all around yesterday.

So today, Jerry and I both had some school stuff to get done. I had to do a highway clean up in Morgan, and I got up at 7 to leave. I went out to my car and ............It won't start.

Maybe I'll just go back to bed.

However, whenever I have a bad day, I always try to remember that no matter how bad my day is, there is always someone who is having a worst day. Maybe Jerry lost his job, but there is someone out there that lost their job with a wife and kids. Even though the lady may think were liars, somewhere in the world, someone is being killed for false accusations. Even though Jerry's car broke down, someone out there has never even been given the chance to ride in a car. There are people with deadly diseases, lost hope and no food to eat. There are unfortunate people out there that live their lives in fear and others that live in poverty. No matter how bad my day may seem, I should be forever thankful for the blessings I have in my life.

And today,

I'm thankful that Jerry's car is repairable.

I'm thankful that the land lord is giving us a chance.

I am thankful that Jerry had that job interview Thursday, and the job looks promising.

I am thankful that I live where I do.

I am thankful for my dad, Penny, Jeff, Teresa, Bart and Rani, who help us through everyday.

I am thankful for the sun that is out today.

I am thankful that my best friends, Katie and Baillie are in town.

And most of all, and always, I am thankful for my beautiful guardian angel in Heaven, my mom. I know she watches me through every trial in my life, and leads me through my day.

Happy Saturday Everyone!

A Dog Food Factory

2010-04-05T21:10:00.003-06:00

Jerry and I have had quite the stressful day.

Apartments just don't call you up on the phone and say, "Hi, my price is low, the space is big, I include a washer and dryer, I'm clean and you're going to love me!" Unfourtunately, that has not happened and won't happen. So, we continue to look.

I called this lady, that has a few different small houses that have been turned into apartments, I emailed her once and she said to call to make an appointment to go look at them. I've called 3 times, each time I have left a message, and she still hasn't called me back. What kind of customer service is that? ugh.

We have an appointment to go look at an apartment in Layton Wednesday. Can't wait!

Anyway, let's move on.

It rained....ALL DAY!

And now, it's a blizzard outside, it's already put down probably 3 inches of snow. R.i.d.i.c.u.l.o.u.s.

So much for those new summer dresses I bought.

Now on to the positives of the day:

*Jerry thinks it's quite funny when I make up my own words while singing. I think I do pretty good. :)

* So at our dorm, the basement floor ALWAYS stinks! I mean, come on, it's the guys floor, of course it stinks. There's always an array of smells, including food, body odors, puke, you name it, they've got the smell there. And today.....dog food! Maybe some guy really got desperate and found that dog food is much cheaper than Top Ramen. Who knows? Anyway, this is how the conversation between Jerry and I went:

Me: Smells like dog food.

Jerry: Maybe someone works at the Dog Food Factory.

Me: haha. Dog Food Factory?

Jerry: Yes, the Dog Food Factory.

Me: You're a liar.

Jerry: No, I'm not, there's a Dog Food Factory downtown.

Me: Whatever, psh Dog Food Factory. (laughing)

So we get up stairs, and Jerry, of course has to prove me wrong by asking my room mate Tiffany if there was a Dog Food Factory in Ogden?

And you know what? Sure enough there is! Seriously, that's why Ogden always smells like Dog Food? I just thought it was the Taco Stands. haha. Maybe I could get a job at the Dog Food Factory?

*Only 9 more days of school!!! Then Finals week! YAY!

*But with that comes finals, presentations, homework & extra credit.

*I just wish that I could find a job, but soon enough, soon enough.

* I registered for Summer classes, I will be going full-time. 12 credit hours. Luckily they are pretty short, and I will only be in 2 classes at a time. :)

Happy Monday, my friends

Happy Easter

2010-04-04T20:38:00.003-06:00

I hope that your Easter included,

Some Colored Eggs

Loving Family

Peace in your Heart

Thankfulness for the blessings from God

A good nap

A yummy ham

A cute cake shaped like a bunny

And the reminder of the most important things in life.

Mine definitely included it all!

Happy Easter Everyone!

I just haven't been in the mood.

2010-04-01T18:34:00.002-06:00

Blogging, just hasn't been on my mind lately. I have been b.u.s.y.

I haven't been in the mood, the blogging mood.

Let me tell you what I have been up to lately.

I have been filling out 120948302 applications. I need a job. Bad.

I have been looking at apartments everywhere. Online. On the streets. In my head. I just want one to call my own. I want Jerry and I to have our very own place together.

I have been going to school. Doing homework. Planning my next semester. Debating what classes to take this summer.

It snowed all stinkin' day yesterday. I don't think it stopped for one minute. Quite ridiculous Spring!

Jerry bought me the most beautiful roses, just because. :) I am one lucky girl!

The wind shield in Jerry's car broke.

Jerry's alternator went out in his car today. I was tutoring, as I do every Thursday. And as I was walking out in the parking lot, looking for Jerry to pick me up, I got a message that said, "My car broke down." Grrrreeaaaaaaaaat. He was at 26th and Wall, I was at 22nd and Grant. So I started walking. It was freezing cold, and I didn't have a coat on. Not to mention, there are homeless people roaming, a million cars and well, snow. Right about the time I got to 25th and Grant, Jerry called to tell me that he thought he had ran out of gas, and that a tow truck brought him some, and he would follow him to the gas station. So I continued to walk, and waited for Jerry to come pick me up. I got to the Union station which is at 25th and Wall, and decided to stop there. Finally Jerry came to pick me up. We began to drive to his work, and the car once again broke down. So he called work and asked a friend to come give us a jump start so that we could make it to his work. As we waited, Jerry decided to start the car again, and we made it to his work. He found out that his alternator was bad and he would have to change it. To make a long story short. He got an new alternator, and the car is now working!

A boy at the Elementary school today told me, "You're not old enough to give detention," when I asked him to complete his assignment. Oh boy.

I made the invitations for my sister's baby shower, and got addresses ready. :) By the way, if you would like to come, please get me your address!

So, 2 more weeks of school after tomorrow. We have to move out of our dorms in 3 weeks, and we still don't have a place to move in. But we're working on it.

I hope that you have had an amazing April Fool's Day! But I hope the joke wasn't on you, when the car broke down and you had to walk. ;)

10 Things Every American Should Know About Health Care Reform

2010-03-23T10:08:00.001-06:00

1. Once reform is fully implemented, over 95% of Americans will have health insurance coverage, including 32 million who are currently uninsured.

2. Health insurance companies will no longer be allowed to deny people coverage because of preexisting conditions—or to drop coverage when people become sick.

3. Just like members of Congress, individuals and small businesses who can't afford to purchase insurance on their own will be able to pool together and choose from a variety of competing plans with lower premiums.

4. Reform will cut the federal budget deficit by $138 billion over the next ten years, and a whopping $1.2 trillion in the following ten years.

5. Health care will be more affordable for families and small businesses thanks to new tax credits, subsidies, and other assistance—paid for largely by taxing insurance companies, drug companies, and the very wealthiest Americans.

6. Seniors on Medicare will pay less for their prescription drugs because the legislation closes the "donut hole" gap in existing coverage.

7. By reducing health care costs for employers, reform will create or save more than 2.5 million jobs over the next decade.

8. Medicaid will be expanded to offer health insurance coverage to an additional 16 million low-income people.

9. Instead of losing coverage after they leave home or graduate from college, young adults will be able to remain on their families' insurance plans until age 26.

10. Community health centers would receive an additional $11 billion, doubling the number of patients who can be treatedregardless of their insurance or ability to pay.

Picture Diary

2010-03-22T20:44:00.006-06:00

Last week was Spring Break.

I have done a lot of homework.

I don't have long for this post.

I know, I know, I'm slacking on my 'You mean a lot to me Monday' posts.

BUT only 4 weeks left of school, I should probably concentrate, a little eh?

So here is a picture diary of my last few days. :)

I still love him, that's for sure.

My dad has been tiling the basement. He's so creative.

We have been working on this room too! I can't wait until it's finished!

My room mate gave Jerry a fish for his birthday! We named him Omar. He is not from America. :) I am way more excited about him than Jerry.

Stanley has been overloaded with homework lately. ;)

Wait. Maybe that was uhm, me!

Penny bought me these daffodils. :) I love them!

I asked Jerry would love me if I looked like this? He said,"I would have never given you the chance." Feel the love?

Jerry and I celebrated St. Patrick's day with some friends. :)

Giant Drake decided he loved me.

I decided to give Stanley a bath. He looks pathetic doesn't he?

I bribed him with wet cat food. Poor guy.

Jerry decided to ride and uhm....well break, this horse the other day.

The mountains were so beautiful as I drove to Jordan's house for her bridal shower. :)

Stanley and B show a little brotherly love once in a while.

I decorated my mom's grave for Spring. I loved spending time alone with her. :)

Jerry turned 21!!

And......Maddie took a liking to Jerry.

Happy Monday!

Happy St. Patrick's Day!

2010-03-17T09:40:00.002-06:00

May Good Luck Be Your Friend In What Ever You Do

And May Trouble Always Be A Stranger To You!

Spring Fever!

2010-03-16T19:53:00.005-06:00

Is it just me...or does everyone have Spring Fever right about now?

I know that these last couple of nice days are just a tease. It's possible that it could snow at any minute. ay.ay.ay.

But I'm ready to go to Bear Lake, wear a sun dress and eat otter pops while watching Kobie play baseball.

I want to go out on the boat, go camping and swim in an outdoor pool.

I want to drive to the beach in my jeep with the roof off. I want to have water balloon fight and eat juicy watermelon.

I want to be one semester closer to graduating.

I want to walk out in the grass bare foot and plant a garden.

I want to see my family, have a picnic, and finally meet my new little niece, Kimber!

I want to go for walks in the park and ride a tube down the river.

I want to sit on the roof and watch fireworks go off.

I just can't wait for Winter to turn to Spring, and Spring to Summer.

What about you? Would you prefer a little more snow? Or a lot more sun?!

What are you anxious for this summer?

Truly Blessed!

2010-03-11T10:44:00.006-07:00

Sometimes it is so easy to get caught up in the 'life sucks, everyone's out to get me, nothing ever goes right' kind of mood. But I have found that the more positive I am, the easier it is to see the bright side of things. The easier it is the see the good out of every bad situation. The easier it is help others stay positive as well.

Life isn't all about finding WHAT in life makes you happy. It's about finding out HOW to make your self happy. I know the people in life that make me happy. I know what things in life make me happy. But I also know how to make myself happy, and in return others are happy around me.

Have you ever been out with a group of friend,and there is that one person that just hates everything that is going on and it ruins it for everyone? I hate that!

Have you ever noticed that the happiest, most positive people in life are the ones with the most challenges? There are always stories on the news about disabled people achieving miraculous tasks. The other day there was a girl on the news that climbed Mt. Kilimanjaro with a prosthetic limb. HELLO? I can't even do that with my two perfectly good real legs? I mean, I'm sure I could with, a little inspiration, a little training and a lot of faith. But, man, what an amazing person she is. I use to work at the Learning Lab at my high school, and those kids were my best friend. They always had a smile on their face and something kind to tell me. I could be having the worst day, and a horrible hair day, get a F on a test, and they were still there to tell me that I was there best friend, or that my hair looked good, or that they loved me. They are just truly special.

So why is it?

Let me tell you one of my ideas?

I think that just maybe God gave them a little extra inside. He made them perfect on the inside, even if they aren't on the outside. Maybe their brain can't do math, but they can love, and love unconditionally. Or maybe it is that they have experienced so many hardships that everyday life is truly a blessing.

I feel that I am not even getting anywhere with this.

But my point is, our day to day life is....well, not tough. It's a blessing from God, that we are here everyday. Why would we waste a day to complain, or to hate life. Why would we waste friendships on grudges. Because honestly, eventually our time is going to run out. Shouldn't we spend our time being as happy as possible? Shouldn't we smile at strangers in hopes of making new friends? Shouldn't we look past our own challenges and focus on our abilities?

No one cares if you're miserable, you might as well be happy.

What a weekend!

2010-03-08T21:32:00.007-07:00

Our weekend was so full, I am barely recovering.

When we got home on Friday, Stanley was so glad to see me. He cuddled with me the entire time I was there. I miss him so much, and I wish that I could sleep with him every night.

Stanley laying on me, while I was on the computer. He wanted all the attention.

On Friday night, Jerry, my dad, Penny and I went to eat dinner at The Legal Tender. It's so nice to spend time with my dad and Penny.

Saturday morning we woke up early to put Primer on our newly dry walled...walls. Make sense?

When we were finished primeing the walls, we left for Salt Lake. We had at the Rodizzo Grill. It was so delicious!

We then checked into our room at Little America, got a cab and went to 'The Rail.' Know where that is? No one does. It's back behind Trax, in a tiny little building.

Our view from our 10th floor room.

We waited an hour before the band arrived, due to bad weather in Colorado they had to take a plane and rent equipment.

The concert opened with Joey and Rory. They were on the show 'Can You Duet?' They sing the song 'Cheater, Cheater' know them? If not, check them out...they're really good.

Joey and Rory! (We weren't far from the stage, but we only had our phones to take pictures:( )

The Zac Brown Band then got on stage and sang every song I know...plus some. :) They were so good. One of the best concerts I've been to...except we had to Stand the entire time, and a gigantic man was standing in front of me. :)

After the concert, we tried to find a taxi to take us back to the hotel. Believe it or not, they were hard to find. This lady from VIP Transportation finally found us (they dropped us off there). We loaded in a giant van, with some rather drunk, quite hilarious people. They told us time and time again, "We have 5 kids. We got a babysitter tonight and we can't go home at 10:45!!" Ha.

We fell asleep fast that night when we got back to the room, and we slept clear until 10 the next morning. It was so so nice.

Sunday morning we ate Sunday Brunch. Went to Home Depot to pick our tile and paint for our basement....I'm pretty excited about it. :))

Jerry and I then met Brett and Tayler at Autorama, and we checked out all the cars.

A nice little bug! :)

We then drove back to Ogden and ate some pizza at The Pie.

It was such a fun, eventful weekend. I got to spend it with some of my favorite people in the world, and I couldn't ask to be any luckier.

I hope you had an equally lucky weekend....tell me about it. :)

P.S I dressed up my blog for St. Patty's Day. Like it? A lot of people have been asking me about where I get my backgrounds and banners lately. And I love doing them...the banners that is. If you would like me to make you one, just ask! <3

Dorm Sweet Dorm

2010-03-05T13:21:00.011-07:00

I decided to clean my apartment/dorm today, and I realized that I really am glad that I got to live on campus for these 2 years . I won't be living in the dorms next year because Jerry and I are going to get our own apartment. I started thinking about how I don't have any pictures of my dorm. I want some pictures so that some day when I'm old, telling my kids about my experience at college, I can show them some pictures. And I would just like to have some to have as a keep sake. A lot has happened as I have lived her. Lots of good things, and even a few bad things. All in all, this has been my home, and I have learned so much while I have been here.

And in case any of you have ever wondered, where I live I thought I would give you a little tour.

This is our kitchen. The door leads to the hallway that connects all of the apartments together. We don't have a lot of storage space, so Tiffany and I have our own little cupboards. Mine is on the right side. :)

This is our living room. I don't spend much time in there because I have my own TV in my room, and my bed is much more comfortable than the couch.

This is mine and Tyanne's bathroom. Pretty average eh?

This is my room! We all have the letters on our door with our names on them. I got them for my room mates and I the day we moved in.

This is my desk. Jerry usually sits here, and I sit on my bed. I made the bulletin board above my desk, and it has really come in handy. :)

This is my bed. It has a really great view of the beautiful Wasatch Mountains. Above my bed it says, "Believe in the beauty of your dreams." This has a lot of meaning to me. :)

This is the view from my bed room window today. It's been snowy all day. The mountains are sure beautiful though huh?

Well that's it. It's not much, but it has my home for the last 2 years. A lot of great memories have been made here. Like the time Jerry whaked my head on the wall. Or the time that Jerry and my roommates were doing heel clicks in our living room and the people below us complained and we got in trouble. :)

I hope you enjoyed the online tour! :)

I Have You in My Heart.

2010-03-04T18:05:00.007-07:00

Thought of you today, but that is nothing new. I thought about you yesterday, and the day before that too. I think of you in silence,I often speak your name. All I have are memories and pictures in some frames. Your memory is a keepsake, which I'll never part, God has you in His keeping....I have you in my heart.

Never a day goes by that I don't think about my mom. I think about her when I do something wrong, that she had taught me not to do. I think about her when I do something I know would make her proud. I think about her when I think about my future. And of course I think about her when I think about my past.

There will never be a day of my life, that I won't think about my mom.

I took a nap the other day, and my mom was in my dream. This isn't unusual, she is almost always in my dreams. But this time, it was so real, it was like she never left. And in my dream my mom said to me, "I'm in your dreams, because I never want you to forget what I'm like. I don't want you to forget my smell, my sense of humor, and what it's like to be with me. And I don't want you to forget I love you." I have no doubt in my mind that my mom uses my dreams to talk to me and to be a part of my life. I know, some of you think I'm crazy. But I don't care, because I know she is in those dreams with me. It made me cry as soon as I woke up, because I do miss her so very much.

A few months after she had passed away, I had a dream, and in my dream she told me, "You can't be sad anymore. It's time to be happy."

I know that is what she wants. But sometimes, life is just tough.

I always think to myself, "I wish I could call my mom about this." And sometimes when I am really down, and no one can make it better, I close my eyes, and imagine her hugging me. I think about hugging her, squeezing her tight. And then I think about what she would say to me.

There are some days, that everything I see, everything I do, everything I hear reminds me of her. I see the beautiful trees, and I think about the times when I was little and she would explain to me how beautiful the trees were. I watch TV, and hear canned laughing, and think about how much she hated it. I can hear in my head saying, "Laddddyyyyy!" Because she would call me that and say it in the funniest voice. I think about the times that I didn't call her after every class and she would hurry and call me, because she was worried something would happen to me. She would call me at dusk to make sure I was back at my dorm, and she would call to ask if I made my bed.

To be quite truthful, it isn't fair that I had to lose my mom this early in my life. And it isn't fair that there are people out there that don't appreciate all their moms have done for them. It isn't fair, that the only opportunity I have to see my mom is in my dreams, and there are people out there that take their mom's for granted and don't ever see their moms. And it's days like today that I just want to be angry at someone, as if there is someone to blame.

But I have come to realize that everything happens for a reason, I know. Some days are harder than others, but I know that I will be okay, because I always have those dreams to see my mom, I always have those prayers to talk to my mom, and I always have the memories to know exactly what my mom would do in any situation.

I am incredibly thankful to God for all that he has given my in life. I am thankful for all those who help me through everything. I know that God has a plan, and that I will see my mom again some day in Heaven.

But for now,

I love you mom. I've missed you a lot today. I hope there is a kitty in Heaven for you to cuddle up with, and I hope you are watching a good drama filled Lifetime movie before you go to bed. I hope that Grandma Darlene is glad to have you by her side once again. Please watch over Dad, Jessica and I.

I love you just the way you are!

2010-03-03T16:32:00.002-07:00

I can't tell you how much he means to me. Or the butterflies I get in my stomach when we softly pulls my hands up to his lips and gently kisses it. Or when he randomly says, "Cole, I love you!" I love the way he does things for me, just because he knows I like it. He puts lotion on my back and gives me a little massage almost everynight. I couldn't possibly be any luckier.

I love this, long-legged, big footed, cave-man looking, air-guitar playin', ugly singin', incredibly sweet, boy!

I loved you yesterday, I love you still.

I always have. I always will.

You Mean A Lot to Me Monday

2010-03-01T15:21:00.004-07:00

Today's the day that I have been counting down to for a while!

And you know what?

Jay and my sister were hoping for a boy, but I know they will love this girl just as much.

She will definitely be spoiled.

On my mom's side of the family the first born has been a girl for the last 6 generations. I think it's a sign. We have a picture frame with the babies first picture. And this little baby can now be added.

Kimber Barrett

I can't wait for her to get here, because that girl means a lot to me now, and will from this day forward. :)

July 25, 2010

These are the best days of our life!

2010-02-28T22:33:00.007-07:00

My weekend was the best.

Friday night after Jerry got off work, we went to P.F Changs for our late Valentine's day. It was so nice to spend time with my Jerold! We got to P.F Changs around 6:45, and they told us the wait would be about an hour and ten minutes. Two hours later, we finally got a table and were able to eat. We were so hungry by that point. We had plans to go to 'Dear John' at 9:35, but our dinner took too long. We decided to head to Evanston after dinner. But first we drove up by the beautiful capital building. I loved it! We went for a little drive up in North Salt Lake, got some gas and headed home.
On Saturday Jerry and I went snowboarding, well kinda. We got to Pinecreek around 8:30, and I only went on one run before I decided I was too sick to go on anymore. I sat in the Ski Patrol hut (Jerry is a ski patroller) the rest of the day, while Jerry snowboarded. Luckily Matt was there to keep Jerry company. Once we got back to Evanston, we ate dinner with Penny and my dad. Then Jerry and my dad played some pool. We finished off the night by visiting Miss. Katie and going to bed. :)

Today, I did homework for most of the day, while Jerry and my dad hung insulation in our backroom. They will be putting up sheet rock later this week. Then Jerry and I went to have dinner at his dad's house for his step brother's birthday. We played some poker then headed home. I made my dad some dinner and worked on some more homework (It's a never ending cycle).

But do you know what the highlight of my weekend was? I'll give you three guesses?

That's right, I finally got a cupcake. I made them today! And they were delicious if I do say so myself. :) I even have enough to take some with me to Ogden this week. :) Yum!

I hope your weekend was filled with moments you will remember for a lifetime. :)

Be happy for this moment, for this moment is your life!

Just thought I'd share some humor.

2010-02-28T20:13:00.004-07:00

Couldn't help but share this with all of you. :)

I don't have much respect for Sarah Palin.

However, I respect your opinion, if this insults you, I am sorry.